Back in December, we had an all-together lunch with some friends whose daughter and son are longstanding friends (former schoolmates) of our children. Christmas was around the corner, therefore everyone was in the holiday spirit, anticipating the annual celebration with all its traditions and (inevitable) headaches. This couple had surprisingly (to us) been visiting our church, and as such, once we realized this, saw fit to make a concerted effort to recognize this exciting move via breaking bread together.
Some veteran Jackson Mississippi Samson guys' musings, recommended resources, and Samson Society news / updates (all written by 100% Grade A - Human Intelligence)
Weekly meetings available to you are as follows:
Tuesday at 6:30 PM, Truitt Baptist Church - Pearl. Call Matt Flint at (601) 260-8518 or email him at matthewflint.makes@gmail.com.
Wednesday at 6:00 PM, First Baptist Church Jackson - Summit Counseling Suite - 431 North State St. Jackson. Call Don Waller at 601-946-1290 or email him at don@wallerbros.com.
Monday at 6:30 PM , Vertical Church - 521 Gluckstadt Road Madison, MS 39110. Mr. Roane Hunter, facilitator, LifeWorks Counseling.
Wednesday at 7:00 PM, Crossgates Baptist Church. Brandon Reach out to Matthew Lehman at (601)-214-4077 for further info.
Sunday night at 6:00 PM, Grace Crossing Baptist Church - 598 Yandell Rd. Canton. Call Joe McCalman at 601-201-5608 or email him at cookandnoonie@gmail.com.
Tuesday, January 16, 2024
Jesus January - Mid Month Update
Tuesday, October 10, 2023
Hot Tub Time Machine / Reckoning With NOLA "Steve"
Our family (Angie & I and our middle schooler) just returned from a long weekend relative to my 8th grade daughter's fall break (coalescing with my beautiful wife's 53rd birthday). As such, NOLA was our getaway vacation city, and it offered some interesting developments regarding my recovery (whilst also being incredibly refreshing / relaxing as a fall weather getaway).
I have a number of NOLA vacation childhood memories. Mainly due to how easy it was to reach (3-hours) by car from Jackson.
During my senior year of high school, my parents and I took a trip to "The Big Easy" to see Ole Miss play Tulane in the Superdome. The year was 1990. At the time, the New Orleans Centre shopping mall was directly connected to the Superdome indoor arena. It's important to note that this 3-story, marble-floored, skylight-lit testament to free enterprise failed to survive 2005's Hurricane Katrina due to extensive flooding via the storm surge.
It was during this football game that I slipped away from Bob & Darlene in order to "kill some time" wandering the retail storefronts of New Orleans Centre. Nonetheless, (as most teenagers do) I had an ulterior motive.
Having made a beeline to Waldenbooks, I very nervously purchased a clear plastic sealed copy of Playgirl magazine. Immediately following, I took the escalators to the top floor of the mall, found as quiet of a corner as I could and began coolly perusing this naughty periodical.
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Wednesday, September 20, 2023
It's Endearing Providing Matrimonial Security (After All These 27 Years) Whilst Horizontal
I mentioned (within a previous post) our recent sleep divorce. This was something facilitated by our middle daughter (also) leaving for college this fall. In anticipation of this, over the course of this past summer, the "big girls" room was transformed - via new twin beds / mattresses - from child's room to extra bedroom.
Throughout, my wife was (somewhat privately) repositioning all of this on her own behalf. Particularly when it came to the mattress purchases (they were quite luxuriously expensive).
My wife's "stroke arm" (her left arm) is often (most comfortable) extended perpendicular to her body whilst she snoozes. Hence, our queen bed doesn't necessitate this well, particularly with her 200lb husband (me) adjacent.
Hence, about a month ago (in tandem with daughter #2 leaving for college), the sleep divorce was finalized. It took me absolutely no time to adjust accordingly, though there were a few nights of eeriness as I began to imagine that Angie had stroked out for a second time and had died.
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Earlier this week, Angie announced that the sleep divorce was over. She was ready to sleep re-marry.
Why?
At first, she was sharing the room with our youngest daughter (8th grader) who was sleeping within the adjacent twin bed. But that didn't last (her snoring quickly shut this Jill & Jill setup down).
It was the aloneness that got to her. Being there within that tiny bedroom by herself.
I'm wondering, though I haven't mentioned it, if it harkened back to her weeklong May 2020 hospital stay post-stroke. Being ushered in and out of ICU a handful of times throughout that week, and being there alone (I was only allowed to visit for one hour midday, each day, due to pandemic restrictions), made a distinct impression.
So now she's back in bed with her husband. And, according to her, she's sleeping soundly.
It feels nice to provide that security to her via exceedingly close proximity.
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My oldest friend's (college) somewhat recently widowed mom began sleeping with a call-in radio broadcast playing from the adjacent pillow. She did this to honor her deceased husband's presence enough to replicate that deeply longed for feeling of husband security (her husband died in his early 90s).
Now she's found herself alone in the single-family home that they'd owned together for decades.
Women crave security. Men crave respect.
Angie feels secure. Rob feels respected. Win-win.
Sunday, February 5, 2023
Thanks Silas 2.0 (& 1.0)!
I learned firsthand from Silas 2.0 how critical it is for me to connect (relational accountability) with men who're like me but who also embody portions of my ideal (masculine archetype).
Here are some specifics:
Friday, December 23, 2022
Unexpected Blessing (In Spite Of The Soreness)
Earlier this week, I spent a few hours circuiting through a CrossFit workout in my Silas' garage (alongside the Man). Now, this wasn't the first time I'd exercised within a CrossFit box, but it was a first for me to relegate myself to a WOD (Workout of the Day).
Saturday, November 26, 2022
Pivotal Moments
My current Silas had lunch with me (under the guise of two old friends catching up) back in April and it was timely. In spite of me having looped him in prior (many years before last April) to what Samson Society was, where it met, etc., he'd made no movement towards; but that all changed last April. We ate, he confessed (conceptually) to needing what it offered, and the next thing I knew, he'd drank the Samson Kool-Aid (down to the very last drop!). Today, he feels like my younger brother. Growing up - so to speak - before my very eyes within the same community I did. Moment by moment. Day after day. Week after week. Month after month. My hope is he'll stick with it for as long as it "takes" (for him). And based on what I'm witnessing so far, that means we're in for a longstanding ride.
Friday, September 23, 2022
Insinuating The Ultimatum / Rerun relationship
My first Silas relationship was one that cross pollinated (he and I served each other as Silases) despite the fact that we were not (yet - by a long shot) integrated into Samson Society. And this was because we weren't privy to it (this was 2010 / 2011 / 2012). Nonetheless, we knew exactly what we both wanted from the friendship for we were both struggling mightily with compulsive sexual sin (porn consumption).
Sunday, August 28, 2022
These Are Dangerous Times To Be Living Alone. Especially If You've Established A Perceived Anonymity Involving Both The Internet & Sexual Sin.
I love meeting new Samson guys. Hearing their stories and supporting them therein via my listening ear is what it's all about. There's no judgement there. It's all about simply listening, asking questions and listening some more. Perhaps eventually, they'll be a recommendation or two tossed from my lips, but those are always at a minimum (though I must admit their seeming authoritativeness can be off putting to some) until I feel so moved.
Friday, July 29, 2022
Stand Up For Yourself. Samson Society Is A Selfish Pursuit. As You Mature In Your Recovery, Optimize Your Approach To Said Recovery.
You are loyal to no one within Samson Society. This is not a fraternity or a men's club. Samson Society isn't a discipleship group or a men's Sunday School class. It is a community of men seeking recovery, and you are responsible for taking full advantage therein relative to your specific recovery.
Thursday, July 14, 2022
"What Are You Doing?"
Angie walked in on me masturbating a few evenings ago. I was in my usual spot in our bathroom, seated in front of the full-length mirror which is affixed to the rear of our toilet room door. I'd gotten out of bed quietly before slipping into the bathroom, stripped down (I only wear skivvies to bed), lit a candle and gone to work.
Saturday, June 4, 2022
My Need To Be Seen / Pursued By Men I Respect (& How Porn Defaults To Fulfill That Need)
All of my issues with gay porn - for the most part - have a common denominator of attempting to fill a void of feeling isolated from the universal community of men.