Your Reputation (Race / Sex / Sexual Orientation) Precedes You / Take A Chance On Me

What must it be like to grow up as a young man within this culture who happens to be black as well as a devout Christian.  To be more specific, a Christian who's motivated to remain faithful to all Scripture as well as his role as an adopted son of God, taking his faith seriously indeed, and therefore looking to eventually marry and have children, giving himself the privilege of leading as husband / father.

Within a similar vein, what must it be like to grow up as a young man within this culture who happens to be gay as well as a devout Christian.  To be more specific, a Christian who's motivated to remain faithful to all Scripture as well as his role as an adopted son of God, taking his faith seriously indeed, and therefore looking to eventually marry (a female) and have children, giving himself the privilege of leading as husband / father. 

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My local McDonald's was once (& may still be) managed by a black man named Charles.  Charles was close to my age (46), though a few years younger.  We'd chat on occasion when I was in the restaurant sipping an iced tea or mocha frappe.  I'd sometimes attempt to steer the conversation towards his faith by asking personal questions relative to church, and I recall specifically him citing his disdain for his local black congregation due to their propensity to embrace adulterous behaviors as part of the norm.  That was sad to hear but intriguing from the standpoint of him reneging on his people group.  Which leads me to...

sorta my own lot in life as a Christian man who's also one who struggles with homosexual desires yet chooses to see my fellow gay behaving brothers as headed in the wrong direction morally.  

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I grew up in the '80s at First Baptist Church Jackson.  At that time, the Senior Pastor was Dr. Frank Pollard.  In terms of articulation and humility plus intelligence, there's was none moreso than Dr. Pollard.  Considering FBC was a Southern Baptist church, this made his tenure there all the more special.  Frank Pollard was born and raised in west Texas, therefore in terms of minorities, it would have been Hispanics more than blacks that provided local color during his growing up years.

One Sunday morning during one of the three sermons he was slated to preach, Dr. Pollard made a statement that drew ire of the one singular black choir member up in the loft.  The comment amounted to him citing his pity towards blacks relative to their people group as whole, and from there, the black choir member took it upon herself to exit stage left.  As you can imagine, it was akin to other publicity stunts that people feel so moved to enact.  But, I must say, it got her point across.  And that is, no one, no one, no one needs to expose hard, unspoken truths.  That is, unless you're able to codify that truth with real world experience.  

Stay tuned for Part 2.

Powercoitus

+/-10 years ago, I dedicated myself to strength training / bodybuilding.  I started with a once a week workout before (after 6 months) graduating to twice a week.  7 or 8 years ago, I trained for a 5k with a group from Lakeside Pres and haven't looked back.  So, at the present, I strength train twice a week and run twice a week.  As a boy who shied away from athletics, instead embracing music and art, this was a significant paradigm shift for me that wasn't easy in the least.

Most middle age Mississippi men are overweight as a result of zero involvement in physical activity.  Fried foods and loads of carbs are their mainstay southern meals, topped off with either booze or diet soda.

And oddly enough, Christian men seem no different overall here in the great state of Mississippi.  I didn't want that for myself long-term despite the fact that it feels like a natural progression as men age.

This trend is fueled by a lackadaisical mindset towards being fit that's become epidemic.  Hence, a man's tastebuds rule along with his eyes.

See it, smell it = eat it (lots of it).  Physical fitness = zero interest.

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On Christmas Day last year, I went for a run with one of my daughters who was riding her bike beside.  I believe it was around 10 AM.  Our typical route is essentially an access road that runs parallel to adjacent neighborhoods to our own.  From what I recall, it was sunny out and very mild.  Whilst making our way to our turnaround point 1.5 miles from our house, I couldn't help but notice an SUV loaded up with four fat, unkempt mid-30s white men who were all glued to their pocket computers, poking and scrolling, punching and loving on those precious things.  20 minutes later, during our return trip, they were more or less in the exact same spot idling in the middle of the road, all doing the exact same thing.

Then I realized what they were doing.  Call it a cultural epiphany.

Christmas Day Pokémon.

I then stopped running and walked up to the vehicle.  It took a few seconds for anyone inside to take note of my presence before the driver rolled down his window.  From there, I asked him if I could pray for them.  He stared at me whilst rapidly blinking.  I then reached in and grabbed one of his hands.  He reflexively put down his cellphone and bowed his head.  My off the cuff prayer for these men went something like this.

"Dear Lord.  Thank you for this Christmas and for Jesus who we celebrate on this special day.  We pray this morning for a mindset of honor and respect towards your holiness and love for us.  We ask that you help us to be men who acknowledge the gift of your son, Jesus, throughout our lives.  Go with us throughout the remainder of this day.  In Jesus name I pray, amen."

From there, I smiled, thanked them and continued to run.  And I haven't seen them since.

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Over the past few weeks, I have made one change to my strength training regimen, and that's incorporating powerlifting (or some semblance thereof).  Powerlifting is maximum weight, but for Rob it's really just much more weight than I'm used to for a few less reps.  Still, it's been a shock to my system on one hand while truly invigorating me on the other.  There's something about pushing myself towards a breaking point within 10 steady, very heavy reps.  In fact, it actually hurts to do these reps at some of my joints.  All in all though, it's energizing to test my limits.  In many ways, I feel as if I've trained all these years to now move to this next logical level.  And not because I'm trying to prove something or gain additional muscle mass.  Instead, I'd like to think I'm headed in this direction as a natural physical progression - particularly considering that I'm not naturally athletic by any means.

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Back in 2014, a client of my 'rents up in the Mississippi Delta was interested in having us assist their hourly employees with enrolling them into Obamacare, therefore I was volunteered to take on this task.  Most of these were good natured, hardworking men who'd been employed there for some time.  It was interesting to assist them in enrolling, and obviously I learned a lot as they answered each enrollment question personally.

One fairly young man stated that he had fathered a dozen children via a dozen different women.  I asked him why, and he said he'd always wanted a lot of kids.  Thinking back on that today, I believe Eddie Murphy has a similar story that he's made no attempt to shy away from.  It also makes me think of men within countries like Belize or Africa where the notion of engaging in powercoitus is a way of life.

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So what is powercoitus?

It's the natural progression of intercourse when it's exclusively classified as a physical activity, divorced completely from the emotional / spiritual.  Not unlike strength training or running.

Coitus is meant to stay within the confines of marriage.  Whilst there, it represents the union between husband and wife.  But, of course, that's only by choice.  It's not like a husband's wiener will only fit within his wife's vagina.

So, what lays the groundwork for men to progress towards powercoitus?

Sexual activity early in life and multiple sex partners either prior to or during marriage.  Not to mention a propensity for some men to emotionally engage exclusively via sexual activity.

My Silas has stated that if there's one thing he could erase from his past, it would be his memories of the women he'd intercoursed with prior to marriage.  And this is due to the fact that those memories gnaw at him even today.  To be more specific, they complicate his relationship with his wife because they're part of a narrative that should never have been written with his body.

The Bible cites sinning against one's body.  Especially as a Christian, it identifies the body as the temple of the Holy Spirit.  Therefore, sins committed against one's body are distinct, and unfortunately make a lasting impression.

And this is where powercoitus begins to seed itself as a naturally feeling, physical progression.  All the while, the spirit of God living in us as Christians is prostituted.

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A new friend of mine (tangential to Samson Society), who's a resident of sunny Florida, has been married for decades to his beautiful wife.  They're in their late 50s, have grown children and numerous grandchildren.  This man is also into strength training (as is his wife), and we connected thanks to Mr. Nate Larkin at some point late last year.  It's been my privilege to walk with Todd over the past few months.

Throughout Todd's marriage, he's been unfaithful via +/-80 sex partners, and none of this powercoitus was anything more (initially) than for the fun of sexual activity alone.  On some occasions, the sexual relationship would develop into a friendship as well, but always, the initiator / language of connection (if you will) was sex.  If you do the math, taking into account a 20 year period of time, that equates to one new sex partner per quarter (every 90 days).  And that, dear reader, is a typical example of powercoitus.

Whilst dialoguing with my new friend about this eye-opening part of his story, he admitted that many, many more sex partners came to be - over the past 5 to 8 years - thanks to the advent of hookup apps.

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And that leads me to my conclusion.

Money making technology is being created / refined daily to exploit men's fleshly bent towards powercoitus.  That is sexual activity with no strings attached.  Hook ups.  Friends with benefits.  The swinger lifestyle.  And it's leading an awful lot of people straight to hell.

Therefore,

beware of powercoitus.  It feels so right and looks to make sense as a natural progression, but like everything else that works against God's will, it's a massive deception.

Lagniappe

Recommended Reading From My Favorite Pastor, J.D. Greear

https://jdgreear.com/blog/what-it-really-means-to-have-our-minds-transformed/

Traveling With A Liquid Drug In Your Hand

My first Silas found the motivation to commit to Samson Society via a cataclysmic juncture between his taste for booze (beer) and Louisiana law enforcement.  And unfortunately for him, this juncture occurred during a perfunctory business trip.  I'll never forget the privilege of accompanying him to his arraignment (+/-18 months later).  I watched him stand before the judge to officially start the lengthy legal process of living out the punishment / procedural hurdles for his wrongdoing.  Afterwards, I recall eating lunch with him at Five Guys (my first time) there in Lafayette, and though we were glad to be done with those proceedings, the brevity of what had just occurred within his life as well as the lives of all the other drunks / now criminals, seated itself deep within me.  In the end, it made me thankful that I'd been reared within a household where alcohol was absent.  It sent a message of normalcy downstream from my 'rents.  A message which elevated teetotalers as individuals who could have fun, be funny, feel confident and emotionally whole (be cool) sans booze.

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The private academy where I attended high school didn't do a lot of preaching to us middle to upper-middle class suburban white students.  There were only +/-40 in my class, therefore each K-12 grade had its distinctly averaged behavioral aroma, and as a result, the primary identifiers (students) within my class were definitely on the rebellious side.  Perhaps that's why an "expert" was tasked with coming in and dialoguing with us about alcohol.

I remember her asking us firstly what the most popular recreational drug was across the globe, and I spoke up and answered her with alcohol.  She seemed a little surprised at my response, and whilst looking back, I don't know how or why that particular word came to my mind.

Unless...

there is that one family member who is an alcoholic.  His shenanigans did make an impression on me as a child.

The "alcohol expert" was engaging.  To all of us.  She was confident and obviously smart not to mention physically attractive.  I felt fortunate to be hearing from her relative to being reminded of why I'd chosen not to drink booze.  As a teen, having outside (of parents) positive influence speaks volumes.

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Drinking alcohol is and always has been cool.  Kind of like tattoos are now cool and therefore will always be cool going forward.  It's an identifier of who you are based on the drug type - beer, wine, liquor, cocktails, etc.  Again, like tattoos, highly customize-able.  Therefore, most all adults drink alcohol, but I'm convinced that whilst traveling away from home, they do it much, much more in order to ramp up their cool quotient.

I know this because I've observed it firsthand, but too, I hear friends talk about how booze plays into their travel-time reflexively.

So, what does it mean to be cool?

To be cool is to not be a freak or seemingly freakish.  Cool people radiant that they belong within the crowd instead of on the perimeter of it.  Coolness draws no attention to itself, therefore it's in no way anamolous.  It blankets an individual and therefore imbues confidence.  In fact, it's a confidence that necessitates a desire for always being cool.  Hence, the pursuit of boozing.  Especially whilst experiencing the elevated stressors (new settings, inherent risks, unforeseen delays, dampened expectations, etc.) of travel away from homebase.

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I was in the southwest region of our beautiful country most of last week.  January had been declared a dry month (from booze) for a number of people who were with me whilst away.  One colleague exclaimed her anticipation and excitement of February 1 relative to returning to booze.

And there's the rub.  Boozing starts out exclusively for cool before becoming tasty and delicious on top of cool.  And oftentimes, it leads to intoxication which points back to the beginning of this post and the inherent risks.  This migration is risky in and of itself.

The next time you're traveling (preferentially by air), play a game.  That being, "I Spy".  Within all of the travel mags on the flight and otherwise, take note of the over inclusion of booze, photographed beautifully in order to emancipate the setting(s) from any implied un-coolness.  From there, observe people at eateries, those with and without bars, both in the airport and at your (assumed) vacation destination.  Take note of their beverages of choice.  And finally, watch yourself and how much you too are actually drinking to be drugged.  And remember, if you want to be cool, look to tasty and delicious booze.  Just don't ask yourself how much experience / usability by God you're forgoing whilst pursuing cool.  Personally, I do believe (within certain settings), the answers to those questions will be sobering and then you're back to un-cool.  And this is exactly where the alcohol industry wants you to shy away from.

Not uncool

What May Happen When They Find Out Who You Really Are

Demonization*

Get preferential help today by investing in yourself and others through Samson Society.

*Relative to morality, the Bible Belt exempts no one from marginalization.

What I Want In Lieu Of What I Need To Hear

Early on in my involvement in Samson Society, I watched a close friendship between two young Samson men implode seemingly overnight.  These brothers in Christ were closer than any two men I'd ever had the privilege of knowing.  They were both of similar ages, one was recently divorced and the other a bachelor.  Both loved adventure - playing games, spending time outdoors, knocking back a few beers together.  And each of them found each other within Samson Society here in Jackson.

And then it was over.  And from there, the bachelor jettisoned Samson Society from his schedule pretty much entirely.  It was so unfortunate.  He was one of the most articulate, compassionate, energetic men I've ever met, and man oh man, did he have an incredible backstory.

And then he was gone.

I ran into him at some point last year in the grocery store, and unfortunately, I could not remember his name.  It had been that long.

I realize friendships are typically short-lived.  That fact is not shied away from within the Samson Society charter.  But, many times, there's intentional sabotage when one party is offended or simply tired of hearing the truth relative to his situation in tandem with his proximity / distance to the truth teller(s).
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The topic that caused such consternation between these two young Samson men was too deadly for one to not ignore (out of love & concern) and too personally definable for the other to yield on (or to even consider yielding on), therefore implosion occurred.  Observing this dynamic was such the eye-opener to me relative to how difficult it actually is for we as men to digest criticism that we simply do not wish to hear, and subsequently how cowardly we can behave in response to our not wishing to face said difficulties.

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The 'hood I grew up in was '80s Madison through and through.  Cookie cutter ranch / usonian houses with little to no differentiation stylistically.  In other words, think of the opposite of what you find there in 2020.  Our hood was 50/50 blue and white collar whites, and where we resided on St. Augustine Dr. afforded us the privilege of living adjacent to a plumber, his wife, and their 3 children.

Whenever our kitchen sink would become clogged, our neighbor would generously come and unstop it shortly after receiving a succinct phone call from my dad.  And this seemed to happen often.  But when it did, this was the one time we'd actually see the patriarch from next door - up close and personal.  Never once do I remember my 'rents inviting them over for lunch or dinner.  To church or otherwise.  And all this purposeful / intentional distance stemmed from proximity (stone's throw) to one another.  Had our plumber neighbor lived with his family 10+ miles away, and perhaps had been a client of my father's, then maybe there'd been more of an effort made to minister / be hospitable.

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My point is this.  Samson Society moves you into the same "platonic neighborhood" with a group of men.  For the most part (99% of the time), these men are investing within the ministry in order to mature forward whilst being within an authentic - weekly meeting - community.  Over time, God's going to speak in and through some of these men.  Considering that truth, your greatest discomfort is going to come from facing the arbiter of that criticism again and again (whether you agreed with it or not) as your continue forward within the ministry.  And this is purposeful and healthful.  Keep "iron sharpening iron" in mind here.

The reason neighbors rarely invest relationally within each other is to avoid the risk of ticking someone adjacent off.  And to carry that analogy forward, it must also include the notion of possibly having to pick up and relocate (or vice versa) after being offended / ticked off, and who wants to do that?

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Samson Society is such the Catch-22 in this regard, and the only way around it (that I've found) is to be really inconsistent with one's attendance.  Therefore, those large gaps in time can serve as an emotional buffer zone.  Not at all unlike residing next to an Airbnb.  But who really wants to reside next to an Airbnb?  Nobody.

Parallel Coursework

I had some dear clients of mine ask recently about my experience (primarily collegiate) as an architect.  This inquiry stemmed from their middle son's interest, and their collective responsive apprehension.  Most educated people know that the pursuit of becoming an architect isn't for the faint of heart.  But as I detailed my thoughts to them, I couldn't help but recognize the similarities in character needed to also thrive within Samson Society.  Here are my top 10 (in no particular order):

1.  Courage to be vulnerable to criticism (lots of it) from people you don't necessarily respect.

2.  Team players need not apply.

3.  Strong work ethic

4.  Overarching generosity and selflessness relative to participating on behalf of the (betterment of the) community as a whole.

5.  Strong sense of humor (related to #10)

6.  Willingness to grow in one's faith

7.  Looking for a personal challenge

8.  A love to hate (at times) attitude

9.  Male (I realize I'm sexist)

10.  Humility as you look upstream at where you're headed

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The thought of being involved in Samson Society:

The reality of being in Samson Society:

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In the end, I encouraged them to spend a day with their boy at the School of Architecture, taking a private tour.  This will allow them to see firsthand what their expectations are.  Plus, he'll see students and their work on display throughout the building.  I distinctly remember making this journey for myself as a high school student back in the '80s.  And for me, it sealed the deal within my mind of what I felt compelled to move towards academically.

Similarly, if you're thinking about becoming involved in Samson Society, you should take the time to pay a visit to a local meeting.  And arguably do so multiple times (at multiple venues) in order to find the specific meeting which fits your own personal bill.

Standing back and looking into Samson Society from a distance is no good.  Take the dive today under the guise of "personal / spiritual reconnaissance work".

The Stubborn Spouse (Refusing To Listen Because I Don't Like What I'm Hearing)

Marriage isn't roommates.  It isn't bestest friends.  It isn't open (puke).

Marriage is two becoming one flesh.

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My junior year (high school) English teacher was a devout Christian who was also very down to Earth relative to her persona and approach to instruction.  Most everyone at our small private academy liked her instantly because of the latter, though her faith did seem, to most of us, to be a little extreme.  We knew this because she was akin on occasion to detailing stories about how her faith intersected with her life outside of the four walls of our classroom, within her family, marriage, etc.  And she was nonchalant with her delivery.  As if everyone within earshot would be privy / copasetic to her particular "holy-spiritualized" outlook on life.

Once she relayed to us that she'd felt an overriding negative sense of "mother's intuition" regarding a planned trip her teenage son was set to take.  This trip involved air travel with other friend's of her boy, therefore the notion of pulling the plug on said trip would no doubt be disappointing to him.  But, in the end, she did so, and of course, from there, they wondered if they'd ever know why exactly these feelings came on.  But, nothing came of either their wishes nor (thankfully) any of the negative energy relative to those who traveled sans her son.

In the end, it was clear that she had no regrets on following through as the mother of her only child.

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I have no idea whose hand that's supposed to be at the bottom of this Sunday School-like illustration, but nonetheless, I like how it emphasizes a protective covering that's layered, top down.

And this brings up the topic of hierarchy within marriage which is distinctly Scriptural.  In contrast to that, you might find:

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Many years ago, I was fed up with my job as an architect, and after applying elsewhere (at other firms here in Jackson) to no avail, I started wrestling with the idea of changing vocations.  My employer at the time was likely inclined to keep me within the position I was in for many years to come, but nonetheless, I felt so much inner disappointment as to what I was doing to earn a living.  Keep in mind too that my struggles with Internet porn were really ramping up during this time - both at home and at work - which certainly added to the mix of difficult emotions.

On the home front, we had two toddlers that my wife was taking care of full-time, therefore she was already greatly distressed just in dealing with those little sinners.  To add to that - my own distress, as her husband, to the mix only made things that much more difficult for our marriage during this season.

So we fought.  And fought.  And man, whilst looking back, did I ever need some high caliber friends to minister / counsel me, but this was decades ago.  Angie and I were in our 30s.

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Today, those aforementioned toddlers are young women (16 & 14), and my wife is all about being Super Mom.  Super Mom is dedicated (150%!) to her children as if the basis of their futures as successful citizens of the US is tied exclusively to her performance as the Turner matriarch.

So, as you might imagine, I get some kickback from her when we disagree on exactly how she should be executing her role.  And keep in mind that this rarely happens, and more often than not, she'll come to me for input knowing full well that I've earned it as her husband.  And I love that.

Now back to this whole notion of intuition.  Mother to children.  Husband to wife.  Wife to husband.  Children to parents.

Getting soaked from life's downpours isn't the end of the world.  In fact, oftentimes we learn an awful lot about ourselves and our circumstances relative to our identity in Christ (faith) through those downturns in life.  But, we can only take on so much water, and that's a truth that ultimately no one wants to vouch for (die through).  The notion that what does not kill you makes you stronger isn't necessarily true, though I'll admit that it does sound very western (American) and easily branded.

Taking that into account, pay heed here to what I'm about to say:  Your spouse, because they truly are your better half (remember, one flesh), is best suited to protect you from your own self out of holistic self-preservation.  To be more specific, they know your story, your limits, your heart and this all adds up to understanding you from a historical standpoint.  Therefore, exhibiting stubbornness is understandable early on within marriage whilst receiving their input to whatever you've chosen to disclose, but over time, this needs to cease and be replaced with an attitude (& subsequent responses) of gratuity.  Unless, of course, you find yourself married to a mentally / emotionally ill or untrustworthy spouse, but we're assuming here that's not the case.

I've always liked this, therefore I thought I'd include it here despite it not completely fitting in with the subject of this post.  I believe Jesus spoke often about not discounting but standing alongside the marginalized / broken down with dignity.  Of course it helps if they're built like underwear models, buck naked and all into giving bear hugs.

The Accuser

When I was in 7th grade, I encountered my first (& most noteworthy) accuser at school.  His name was Jim, and he was a few years older than I was.  Jim really enjoyed making me feel worthless by taunting me.  Name calling wasn't his repertoire.  It was mocking.  In fact, I unfortunately can still hear him do this within my mind's eye if I concentrate hard enough.

And of course, he'd set about mocking me amongst my peer group within settings I already felt uncomfortable within, and this amounted to the perfect emotional storm for me.

Jime was the epitome, for Rob, of Accuser, in human form at least.

We also had a neighbor whom chose to similarly give me hell on occasion, but this young man was closer to my age and not nearly as well respected amongst his peers.  Therefore, his taunts never penetrated my heart as effectively as Jim's did.

All and all, Jim was athletic, Type A, handsome, and very articulate.  Hence, he was well respected, if not feared by most everyone around him.  All of this notoriety he used as collateral whilst eeking out what little value any of us lesser "mortals" had at our disposal.

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"LOOK AT HOW PATHETIC / WORTHLESS YOU TRULY ARE!"

And this leads me to Satan, who is the ultimate accuser, and his words as well as his point of view unfortunately, across the board, make a significant impact on men.  I used that word worthlessness earlier in this post, and I must say, that's truly been Lucifer's main focus relative to this attacks on Rob throughout my life.

How best to resist this, besides the usual Scriptural overrides?

When I find myself standing within his line of fire, I try to be cognizant of why he may be so interested in my position as of late.  But this is often tough to do due to the fact that his accusations are so incessant and amplified relative to my systematically mundane mid-life existence.

What's really frightening though about his work is how effective he is at mimicking both the timing and outlook of Jim, my aforementioned childhood accuser.

Let me explain.

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Jim's schemes wouldn't have held water had I not fallen in line with the norm in middle school.  And I did so because I was an obedient child with no interest in rocking the boat.  Also, I trusted the system (school), so to speak, to be the best way forward for me.

And this was key.  Had I not believed enough in myself as well as my surroundings, none of his bullying would have impacted me as powerfully as they did.  In other words, I wanted to become part of the system, allowing it to inhabit me and therefore spell out whatever identity I might glean from it.  Having just stepped out of elementary school into middle school, I was keening interested in towing the line due to the fact that I believed I might find a bit of new self whilst doing so.

Fast forward to today.

God put sweet Angie into my life as an (the only) awesome wife candidate back when I was close to finishing up my final year of college.  She'd been a friend up 'till that point, but our relationship had been long-distance due to her living in Houston, TX.  As you know, we eventually married, and today, that's continued forward to become 23 years of life together, most of which have been spent with our three daughters (we waited almost 6 years to procreate).

There have been times whilst mouthing off during Samson Society meetings that I've exclaimed my fantastical musings of being a porn star in lieu of Christian husband, father, architect, investment advisor, etc., and there's some truth to that rebellious outburst.  And believe it or not, I have no doubt that I'd likely be a successful gay porn star given the right opportunities, taking into consideration just how intensely demanding my flesh truly is.

Antithetical extremes, don't you think?  Dedicated family man to gay porn star.  Nevertheless, they serve as realistic boundaries (this day and age) on each end of my heart's "playing field".

Therefore, whom I typically find stationed on the sidelines relative to each of these identities, is my accuser persistently bombarding me with maleficence regarding the one I've so chosen - for such a time as this (today).  This being the identity (dedicated family man) which happens to be firmly embedded within an Endzone that at times never feels quite correct.  And this is especially true right now.

Why now?

I believe Satan's timing is linked to what he can see holistically that I cannot.  Obviously, the devil is a supernatural being who's the ruler of this world - "Prince of the Power of the Air" - or somesuch according to Scripture.  To be more specific, he's bound to be privy to how vulnerable my family situation is at this time, especially considering my oldest two daughters being teens (16 & 14).  Not to mention how massively busy my wife's workload is as an CPA.  I cite these examples in reference to my standing within our home as the patriarchal anchor.  How much pain / discord / mistrust would ensue were that anchor to be removed or dislodged due to Rob doing / participating in stupid or worse, by wholeheartedly allowing my faith to topple in light of this demonic belittlement?

Do you catch my drift?  But, oh Lord Jesus, how beat down by these accusations do I feel today!

Why does the more saccharine end of the playing field not feel correct - at times - for Rob?  Again, it's all rooted in that god forsaken word - worthlessness. 

It's frightening to be in the line of fire during this season.  Thanks be to God for Samson Society and the community of men who speak accurately into this mid-life Christian man! 

Lagniappe

No Man, Being Reared Here In The West, Dreams Of Growing Up To Become Mr. Spock

And this is because Mr. Spock was a Type B Vulcan, and Vulcans within the Star Trek universe don't allow themselves to experience lust or anger.  Plus, Vulcans only have sex when they go into heat - every 7 years or somesuch.

But primarily, it's their propensity to be Type B personas that put them within the category of "Not The Ideal Man".  Conversely, to continue with this bizarre entertainment allegory, it was (& still is) Captain Kirk whom personified the ideal.  He was the Type AA who was handsome, debonair, and always sexually virulent (willing to jump in bed with most any female alien species he found sexually attractive).

Mr. Spock would have none of that.  He was lean, serious, compliant, loyal to a fault, and thoughtful, or perhaps as we here in the western world might describe him:  sissy, fag, momma's boy, queer, freak, virgin, homo.

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This is the embodiment of Mr. Spock, but it's so not in line with our Type AA ideal here in our culture.  Tenderhearted?

What's hilarious about Samson Society is (based on my experience) the majority of men who end up within this community of men are Captain Kirks, but for Samson Society to work, Kirk personas aren't helpful one bit.  In fact, I would argue, they complicate the community much, much more than synergize it.  And that complication starts at the base level of Samson relationships - one man and his Silas.

And my proof relative to making that statement lies within the answer to the following question:  Whom would you rather have as a Silas?  Mr. Spock or Captain James T. Kirk?

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And this is where the proof lies in the pudding.  Type A's typically don't do this well due to their propensity to be control freaks, therefore in the end, despite Mr. Spock likely wanting to rip Kirk's throat out on occasion, you'd never have known it.  In fact, that particular Vulcan state of mind likely spurred him on that much more towards his end goal of total allegiance to his bestest human-friend.

In closing, Type A's and AA's also isolate with the same aplomb as they attempt to control everything and everyone and every circumstance around them constantly.  And their isolation breeds opportunity to participate in stupid due to their distance from the Spocks within their life.

So...

if you're committed to this community of men, I would argue that you cannot fully contribute well to either it nor your own self fully until you lay down your "I'm the center of the universe, a natural born leader, the best of the best" persona and replace it with "I'm committed to this community, under Christ, for the good of everyone I'm privileged to serve."

And yes, you will feel neutered at times and quite constrained, but in the end, your loyalty towards serving other men within Samson Society will not return to you empty-handed.

Due to him being integral to the series, there's logic behind why Spock was and will always embody the spirit of the beloved Star Trek.  Know too the root of the word integral is integrity.

Lagniappe

"Living In Mississippi Took 10 Years Off Of My Life."

When I heard this from my best friend from high school many years ago, I wasn't surprised.  He'd moved away after graduation with no intentions of returning.  At that particular point in time (relative to his statement), he was living in North Carolina with a friend who may now be his husband.  Reconnecting with him was one of the primary motivators for me to setup a profile on Facebook for a short stint, and yes, I had a sneaking suspicion that Greg was within a living a lifestyle of sexual sin.

Throughout this time of reconnection, thanks to the newly minted social media craze, Greg and I never actually talked.  Our only dialogue was electronic via email, therefore upon hearing this statement, I realized it was coming from a place I was neither equipped nor really interested in exploring.  He and I had spent the majority of our high school years together, therefore this level of criticism of Mississippi was akin to what I vividly remember of his extensive emotional immaturity.

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On the flip side of this statement is a Samson friend whom I first connected with a couple of three years ago.  This man is about my age, having found himself transferred to Mississippi due to his vocation a few years prior to involving himself in Samson Society.  I was privileged to be present during his first Samson Society meeting (and to eventually become his first Silas), and still today, he's chosen to attend meetings and stay committed to The Path.  What's amazing about this man is who he's now become.

It's not my place to tell his story here or otherwise, but having seen the man I saw today (at the Lakeside Pres Samson Society meeting), in contrast to who he was, it is amazing to behold.

In closing, I would argue his living in Mississippi actually added 10 years to his life due to him gaining access to a number of the Metro Jackson, Mississippi Samson Society meetings on a regular basis.  And this, of course, served to foster his journey along The Path and all the good that came from that.  Even if this man someday moves away from The Magnolia state to be closer to his childhood home or otherwise, I'm convinced that the impact God has made in and through him whilst here with us will carry forward.  I do not see the impact him living in Mississippi has made ever leaving this man.  Ever.  Thanks be to God!

Samson 2020 Spring Retreat - April 23-26th

Per Mr. Don Waller:

Men,

We will embarked on another adventure in Ocoee, TN:

                               

                When:                   April 23^rd – 26^th

                Where:                 Ocoee Retreat Center – Walnut Cabin

                What:                    Men’s Coaching Weekend, sharing your story around the camp fire, paint ball, White Water Rafting, Great Food and Fellowship.

                Cost:                      $150 covers lodging, food and paintball. (Rafting $50, incidentals: gas for vehicle you ride in $10 a piece, fast food going and coming, tip for raft guide $10).

                Transportation: Van, Sequoia and Pick- up.

We are limited to 16 – first come, first serve: so if you desire to go please email me and bring check or cash to me or Venmo account Don Waller@Don-Waller or snail mail at P.O. Box 1, Jackson, MS  39205.