The reason men are into buttplay is not necessarily because they're homosexual / have same sex attraction. That's a stereotypical generalization. The reason lies in individual guy's relationship to their anus / rectum.
As we all know, this part of their body is only just a hair lower than a guy's scrotum. Naturally, proximity to genitalia often results in experimentation - especially at adolescence (in tandem with discovering masturbation). As such, that experimentation can result in discovering this "dirty" part isn't necessarily immune to tactile / erotic stimulation (inserting digits / objects).
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It was during a Samson Society intensive weekend a few years back when I first divulged (publicly) using anal sex toys unashamedly. I mentioned it within a story (which I'd penned) that I was tasked with reading. It was one of two tales (story of shame / story of blessing) that each man had been asked to write in advance of the weekend "share time". I don't recall which of the two stories contained this particular detail (I certainly didn't expound on it).
A fellow Samson attendee and I were chatting later on (the following day), and he began weeping (tears of deep-seated shame) whilst privately acknowledging being able to relate to my buttplay travails. I came away feeling conflicted as a result. On the one hand, I was glad to have had the courage to share, but too, that particular detail, to me, wasn't meant as a bombshell confession.
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I'll never forget Silas 1.0 blessing my admittance to using anal sex toys regularly. We were en route back to Jackson from Lafayette, LA where I'd accompanied him to his DUI arraignment (June 2016). I came away feeling seen and heard. Soon thereafter, I gifted him a stainless steel buttplug with a thankful heart.
We never spoke of my interest in buttplay again, and that was absolutely fine by me. Simply knowing that I'd had the courage to divulge this to someone I trusted so completely...that, by far was enough.
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Anatomically, the rectum isn't at all like the vagina. It's not designed to be penetrated. As such, it's very easy for men to injure themselves. Sometimes to the degree that surgery is needed relative to correction / healing.
Years ago, I won a local essay contest, and as a result, had the privilege of befriending one of the other writers (at the awards ceremony). I felt compelled to share my story (over a meal) with this young man, and as a result, he opened up similarly. As a result, he was the first guy I had the privilege to meet who had the courage to admit to receiving a tear in his anal sphincter (due to being sodomized by a well-endowed man). He went on to describe the ordeal in enough detail for me to realize just how unique the anus / rectum truly is. What I mean by that is this: It's certainly a pleasurable part of the body to stimulate, but again, as stated above, it's not at all like the vagina.
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Sodomy between men is sin (as is fellatio, mutual masturbation between men). Women who enjoy being sodomized should no doubt reserve this activity for their husband, and hopefully, he's in agreement with her wishes. I don't believe there're all that many husbands enamored with the notion of penetrating their wives in any other location than their vagina / mouth. Nonetheless, no doubt, there're couples who make sodomy part of their bedroom routine.
Brokeback Mountain (2005) or "The Gay Cowboy Movie" starring Heath Ledger / Jake Gyllenhaal is a recommended film to screen. It fully fleshes out the consequences of men crossing flesh lines (becoming sexual).
There's a scene in that film where Heath Ledger's character, Ennis Del Mar, attempts to forcefully sodomize his wife whilst being intimate, and this is supposedly a consequence of his ongoing backwoods shenanigans with his close friend, Jack Twist (played by Gyllenhaal).
What's interesting about both that scene as well as the (one) sex scene between the two men is how unnatural / forced it obviously is (pragmatically) for them to participate in.
I truly appreciated the filmmakers for realistically displaying this.
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Yes, there are women who experience pain / discomfort during vaginal intercourse. Based on my understanding of this, many of these women are having a physiological response to being penetrated that's rooted in underlying emotional issues stemming from any number of culprits (anxiety, body issues, past abuse / assault, etc.) Too, there're women who have physical issues that also can cause pain / discomfort.
But the majority of women do not experience this.
The vagina is a self-lubricating, warm pleasure hole for a man's penis to repeatedly penetrate. And though there're a small percentage of women who can actually be brought to orgasm via this repetitive experience, most need a little help from their clitoris. Hence, the gentlemanly approach to vaginal intercourse is to allow her to orgasm FIRST.
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For those of you who've never experienced dialoguing with your Silas / other Samson brothers regarding a personal topic like buttplay, my hope is that you'll someday take that leap. Especially if you're participating therein, and simply know within your heart that you need to be heard / acknowledged regarding the matter. Releasing that and not being judged for it is a massive gift.
I've heard so many stories involving everything from nipple play (self-stimulation) to "inflating one's belly" whilst masturbating, and all of these somehow get lumped together into dark, shame-filled corners of men's psyches (which oftentimes provoke ample tears). Corners that can very well end up serving as jumping off points for risky, dangerous behaviors. Behaviors that can lead to serious injury, if not death, because they tend to mutate within that darkness.
Be encouraged to bring everything into the light in due time. Never forget that the men within this community are just as male as you are.
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