I met one of the most devout Christian men I'd ever run across back in 2006. He was from small town Mississippi, having recently been appointed to a state government administrative position here in Jackson. This position entailed he soon replace his "second in command" who was a man whom had served within the state agency he'd been appointed to for decades.
Within most administrative state government positions / lineage, individuals stay put 'till their eligible via PERS to retire. This devout Christian man was no different, though via this new appointment, he was given the opportunity to work within a more challenging / influential position and subsequently, make more money (both then and expectedly during his future retirement tenure).
I was overjoyed to be interviewed by this man for the aforementioned "second in command" position. I was young, but had the leadership skills / drive to do the job well - and man, did I ever want to take on this challenge! Nonetheless, I didn't make the cut. And especially considering this man's obvious Christian stance, I was no doubt extremely disappointed.
Christian bosses had never been part of my vocational narrative up to that point. Ever. Even during architecture school - if not especially during architecture school - pagans lead the way.
The entire notion of working for a devout Christian was incredibly appealing to me. I just knew I would excel within that kind of environment - knowing that I would be reporting directly to him!
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Two years past and I received a telephone call from this man - my devout Christian superhero!
The good news of an open position hit me like a love bomb. I was elated to now have the opportunity to work for this man.
Henceforth, I was on my way to becoming a bureaucrat! Hurray!
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Despite my not being appointed at this time to the originally sought "second in command" position, I excelled as a minion, working diligently to use my skillset on behalf of the state of Mississippi. I really enjoyed the work and actually didn't mind the arduous workload despite my not actually seeing my Christian Superhero much at all. On the exterior, it was all such a breath of fresh air for me.
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Now, let's talk about what was going on personally within Rob during this time.
This was well before I became privy to Samson Society, therefore my struggles with worthlessness / Internet porn were running absolutely unchecked.
To demonstrate this, I remember clearly one day whilst sneaking a quick peek at salacious material online at my bureaucrat cubicle. There came from behind me the following statement: "This was the reason I chose Frank over you."
I swiftly swiveled around in my cubicle, only to see my Christian Superhero there shaming me. I remember looking up at his disappointed countenance, and being so shocked at what he'd just spoken that it left me completely speechless.
"This. Was. The. Reason. I. Chose. Frank. Over. You."
Essentially, I had now received confirmation of the fact that Rob was (and perhaps always had been) nothing more in his mind than a liability. Just. Like. That.
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Christian Superhero never spoke to me after he made that adjudication. Not. One. Word. (I kind of like separating my words like that). And this was despite my additional 3 to 4 years of working at that bureau.
It reminded me (whilst looking back) on the time my father shamed me intensely (as a middle schooler) over my masturbation habit by repeatedly attempting to catch me in the act. I can only assume that Christian Superhero must have suspected something, and therefore took it upon himself to take the same approach my father had all those years ago.
Suffice to say, overall, my father has quite the penchant for reminding me of how I qualify within his mind as a liability - for numerous problematic reasons that go far beyond my middle school days. Hence, I steer clear of him as much as I can. As you might imagine, from this point forward, I did the same with Christian Superhero, though thankfully, that wasn't all that hard to do because as I mentioned prior, he seemed to intentionally steer clear of me after this particular juncture.
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The hard lesson here for all of us is that a man's hopes and dreams of being intentionally cared for in relation to his own personal struggles (whatever they may be) aren't likely to pan out outside of a community like Samson Society.
Even within the most well-intentioned churches with the most devout Christian Superheroes, if there's an opportunity to discount / label another man as a liability to the group (body), that labeling will typically come about.
And we all do this as sinners. In fact, I find myself doing it every day whether I'm panning the congregation from the choir loft at Lakeside Pres or eyeing the panhandler standing on the curb on my way to the office each morning.
Liability there. Liability there. Liability over there. Liability there. Liability there. Liabilities everywhere!
It just feels so good to look down on people. Doesn't it?
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This is why it's so critical that men seek help (and hopefully eventually find it) for their problems / personal struggles. If not, their problems / personal struggles will dramatically undermine both their present and future as it relates to their marriage, vocation, and so forth. It's only a matter of time.
All the more reason to take the resource of Samson Society very, very seriously, and give thanks to God for making it available to you and me both.
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