When I was a middle schooler, my youth pastor became a target for Rob's penchant for lust. Rick was absolutely not interested in having sex with 7th or 8th grade Rob (nor any other of his students as far as I knew), but that didn't stop me from using my hormonal-charged brain to fabricate these sexualized scenarios internally. I, in fact, relished the imagined, secretive flings and all the implied pastoral naughtiness involved. Ultimately, they served as a means for me to exploit my sexual attraction to Rick, and unfortunately, I chose to do this with depraved aplomb.
And this went on, for the most part, throughout my tenure within our church's youth ministry 'till Rick was abruptly terminated. From there, I would see him on occasion, as it wasn't too difficult for him to relocate to "the baptist church across town".
Seemingly harmless sexualization, right? Keep in mind that I was only in middle school.
Of course not. There is nothing harmless about sin. Especially sexual sin which is specifically against (young) man's body.
-------------------------
Pastors minister to people. They do this by leading, teaching, counseling, and so forth. Sometimes this is accomplished from a (physical) platform or perhaps, at times, one on one. There's an air of service that exists with every good pastor. It's an expectation we all have for them as men, and without it, usually serves as the linchpin in their demise. Therefore, pastors typically choose to never shun or discount anyone within the confines of the church (if not otherwise). It's simply not to be in their ministerial DNA.
So, what if this guy (pastor as described) is exceedingly sexually attractive, and that serves as the physical package parishioners are faced with on the surface? What if his build, face, and voice all extol attributes of masculine beauty? Is that a virtue or curse to the parishioners? Or does it matter at all?
And do remember that some of the most notable Bible characters were very good looking men. Think Saul and David to name a few.
-------------------------
Within Samson Society, I've cycled through 2 Silases and am now onto my third. The first two were cross pollinating friendships (we were Silases to each other), whereas 3.0 is not. But, number 3 is also more along the lines of a brotherhood. This man's value system is wired almost identically to my own. Therefore, we both imagine (& hope for) more of a long-term friendship than most Samson Society Silases experience.
One unique feature of our friendship is Silas 3.0's physical presence. He's one of these guys who draws envious looks whilst entering a crowded room, yet isn't self-aware of that on any level. I've observed him while introducing him to friends of mine (outside of Samson), taking note of how respected his presence commands due to his handsomeness.
For me, the aforementioned brotherhood piece typically counteracts my being tempted to revere him similarly, but I must admit that there are times (in certain settings with him) when I'm amazingly reminded of how much influence physical beauty can command.
-------------------------
And all of this leads me here.
There's no doubt that photography has greatly influenced how we see and what we value as human beings. In the not too distant past, photos / videos weren't digital, therefore they were relegated to a select number of "means of distribution". Today however, they're everywhere. All the time. Giving us opportunity to consume imagery at an unprecedented pace.
And everyone knows, looking at photographic imagery takes much less brain power than reading or writing. In fact, doing so for most people is considerably relaxing. Therefore, the more, the better, right? Who's not into effectively relaxing?
At First Baptist Church Jackson (my home church), my pastor during the 1980s, Dr. Frank Pollard, preached 3 sermons most Sunday mornings. He was an amazingly effective conduit for the gospel of Jesus Christ, and at that time, pastor of one of the largest Southern Baptist churches within the Southeastern United States. Dr. Pollard was not an impressive specimen physically. He'd played baseball in college, and had retained his slim physique within his later years, but otherwise, he was just another average-sized looking / built man.
If you were to compare his physical build / presence though to my aforementioned youth pastor, there was no comparison.
And back then, I believe, parishioners felt more comfortable with pastors that looked / behaved like Frank much moreso than pastors who looked / behaved like Rick. In other words, Rick was the exception.
-------------------------
Today, the largest church in Mississippi is not far from where we live. This past week, I was at the Y working out, yet I could not help but overhear a conversation taking place adjacent to where I was doing floor stretches. The dialogue was between a middle-aged man and a younger couple, and the topic was the pastor of this megachurch as well as the church itself (service times, ministries, etc.). So, as you might imagine, it piqued my interest.
A few months back, I was in Wal-Mart perusing the produce when a very handsome man caught my attention. And when I say very handsome man, I'm referring to underwear model handsome.
And then I realized who it was.
The man was dressed way too casually to be the pastor of the largest church in our state, but nonetheless, there he was in his workout clothes. And as you might imagine, this attire did a fine job of extolling his sculpted physique there amidst his fellow shoppers (including me).
Of course, I couldn't help but think back to Dr. Frank Pollard. And that's when I started to get angry.
-------------------------
There's no doubt that physical beauty is a gift from God, and like every gift, it should be used only for his glory. That being said though, I'm one to urge caution / skepticism when encountering it within the pastorate.
The conversation at the Y that I overhead was flush with mancrush for this pastor. The older gentlemen positioned himself as if he was the man's bestest friend based on the level of personal trust his commentary rang of. And maybe that amount of reverence was deserved, but I can't help but question what that situation might have looked like were the pastor not a beauty king.
We are a people wired by our culture's obsession with photographic imagery. And those same persons make up the western church today. There's no differentiating us from everyone else. The same amount of social media is consumed, television is watched, and Internet porn is masturbated to.
And it is programming us to elevate what we see with our own two eyes far beyond where we were back in the analog days.
In the past, I believe men were certainly given credit where credit's due for their physical looks. Today though, they're elevated / revered (words I doled out earlier), and this is very stupid indeed.
Firstly, sexy physiques must be maintained. And this is no easy feat. As far as I know, sexy underwear model pastor competes in Iron Man triathlons year after year in order to "stay fit".
That's an awful lot of pressure.
Secondly, our eyes are the absolute worst judges of character and sincerity. They are so easy to deceive. And very few of us are at all knowledgeable to this. Man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks upon the heart.
Take it from a man who's struggled with homosexual desire all of his life. When it comes to what truly counts in a man of the cloth, it isn't looks. What counts is integrity, genuineness, and faith. So much so that even if the physical package makes you slightly weak in the knees, never back down on maintaining a clear, level head as you vet his teaching through God's word and the theology of the church he represents.
And please, for goodness sakes, don't be like I was. Sure, it's okay to be sexually attracted to someone, whether they're a pastor or not, but absolutely do not act on those attractions within your mind. And if you cannot resist that temptation, do your soul a favor and find another church home.
No comments:
Post a Comment