When Taking Advantage Of Your Own Self No Longer Makes Sense

Hello to new Rob.  Or at least complete Rob.  The Samson Society retreat gifted this to me, and I can see that clearly.

So, why isn't my private behavior reflecting this change?

I believe it's due to my mind not yet catching / syncing up with my body.

The completeness that I feel is bodily.  Like an aura or energy field that's all around me emanating enough light to illuminate my surroundings clearly.  And in turn, allowing me to see clearly who I am in turn.

But, what of my mind?  That sophisticated organ that manages my body and retains all of my memories - if not my understanding of Rob's identity.  What about it?

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I sucked my thumb 'till I was in 1st grade at Madison-Ridgeland Academy.  What convinced me to cease this behavior was me deciding to emulate my older cousin, Tate, whom didn't chew on his fat digit under any circumstance.

My mind is all about routine and therefore constantly second guessing it's surroundings - even if they're newly and subsequently more sharply illuminated.  Lots of rutted neural pathways to re- route, if you know what I mean.

So, how to begin this process?

Prayer.  First and foremost.

There's no overcoming my mind, no planning a re-wire without God's intervention and guidance.  He created my mind and knows it intricately.

So, I have faith that he'll lead.  It may take much more time than I'd like, but I know that in his time, my completely understood identity will take root within my head.  And therefore, my private self (& behaviors) will then clearly reflect this new man.