Demystifying The Archetype

I was introduced to my archetype whilst in 6th grade.  The year was 1985, and I was at a weeklong summer camp for 5th and 6th grade boys in south Alabama.  This summer camp experience was hosted by our church, and surprisingly (to me today), I can only recall 5th and 6th grade boys from First Baptist Church Jackson attending.  Therefore, there were no more than 30 to 40 of us there (if that many) during this week, and this made it a truly intimate experience.

The retreat center was small and rural.  I remember a somewhat small, placid lake accessible by a gravel road, a couple of small bunkhouses and a combined cafeteria / meeting or assembly building making up the campus.  The music of this particular summer was Van Halen's 1984 album, therefore it well represented that particular masculine vibe that was hitting us culturally from most every side.  I can recall vividly during the Friday night "talent show" having the privilege of "running the lights" (turning the fluorescent troffers on and off spasmodically) relative to supporting one of the "boy band" lip sync acts.  No doubt, their song of choice was "Jump".

Our bunkhouse of boys had +/-12 young men within with one college-age chaperone.  His name was Greg, and it was he who made such a distinct impression on young Rob during that week (& beyond).

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What is an archetype?  

To me, it's a figure of mystery that's sexualized relative to timing, in part due to the inevitable awakening of one's sexuality during puberty (childhood).  

Greg was mysterious to all of us boys.  He was very quiet and built like a much older man than his college age suggested.  Therefore, we were all quite intimidated by him.  Yet we were as well, glad to know he was amongst us.  It wasn't that his presence threatened us overall, but you could sense - particularly due to his quiet demeanor - that he wasn't all that pleased about spending his week that summer with us.  

But this mystery was catalyzed when I had a personal encounter with him on the eve of the day we arrived.  This occurred as he stepped naked out of a shower stall.  Both he and I were alone together in the men's room with me standing at one of the lavoratories when his naked and wet reflection in the mirror caught me off guard.  I remember laughing out of shock, and him reacting to my laughter with a "What?".  

Me sharing this very innocent yet intimate moment with him served to elevate this young (but very mature-looking) man within my mind.  Eventually to reside high above the stratosphere throughout much of the remainder of my childhood.

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I longed to be pursued by my archetype.  That was my ultimate desire as a boy.  Not having a father, older brother, uncle, etc. that I felt close to / mentored by, I chose Greg instead.  From there, lust and sexual fantasies ensued.  And this was a bittersweet solution, as you might imagine.  For it certainly didn't reconcile well with my Christian faith, yet it was at times exhilaratingly satisfying to have - within my mind's eye - an older male within my life serving me at my beck and call. 

So how do you demystify these figureheads within your mind?

You don't.  You can't.  They've grown too big, become to strong and are so far removed from reality.  I know that because I attended a funeral a few years back at my home church, First Baptist Church Jackson, and Greg was there with his mother.  They were seated on the same pew as I was.  I realized then how useless an attempt it would be to defang my mind's understanding of the archetype that was birthed out of him.  

But what you can do is face it by providing a narrative to the archetype itself that's best described as back / forward story.  And this needs to be a narrative that's grounded much more so in reality than (sexual) fantasy.  Sure, the archetype can still be over the top aesthetically within this back / forward narrative, but what you're striving for is grounding the character somewhat within your adult mind.  From there, I've found at least, that its influence begins to diminish.  From the standpoint of the archetype being such the exclamation point versus a series of paragraphs (if not more) within your grey matter.

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Why is this important to consider?

The narrative (back / forward story) you contrive for your archetype will reflect your ideals as they exist today versus what they were during your childhood.  And this will reflect clearly upon who you've become as an adult, having grown out of childhood.  

This gives the archetype legs so to speak, and in turn, somewhat equal footing to stand on as you yourself.  In lieu of simply existing as a puppet.

Also, my hope is that you're no longer isolated as you were as a boy, having involved yourself in some form of authentic Christian community like Samson Society.  This should, in turn, diminish the authority of your archetype as you dialogue about it with other men.  And maybe too, what comes out of those conversations will provide you with inspiration therein.  Inspiration that's relative to how best you might approach expanding your ideal into more of a reflection of yourself and less of a teddy bear.

Positive Peer (Silas) Pressure

So much of what we choose to participate in and believe as individuals is massively influenced by our personal peer group.

Yet, often Samson guys intentionally limit their personal peer group by avoiding The Path.  They'll attend weekly meetings, often times quite regularly, but rarely, if ever, step onto The Path.  

Why?

One reason is they're convinced their issues with _______ are "under their control" at the present, therefore attending meetings is plenty involved in Samson Society (at the present time) relative to their issues / current state of mind.  

For me, I compare the experience of Samson Society to being an architecture student back in the early '90s at Mississippi State University.  As a freshman, I was beside myself with both the academic demands put on me coupled with the newly realized (Starkville / dorm room home) setting.   It wasn't 'till my sophomore year though that I began to develop personal friendships.  Obviously, these were friends who I felt comfortable investing in and vice versa.  And what I found whilst making that decision was holistic flourishing / vibrancy / renewal / fun there during my college career.  And this, in turn, undergirded my resiliency and focus relative to enduring my major of choice.

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There were only 7 students (out of +/-45), who started their 5-year stints as architecture students in 1990 at Mississippi State University, that passed through the 5-years uninterrupted (taking a year off / co-oping) prior to graduating.  I was one of those along with my oldest friend, Jason.  Were it not for what I chose to do within my sophomore year, I would have never made it through, uninterrupted or otherwise.  This is crystal clear to me whilst looking back.

A few thoughts for those of you who're resolved to avoid following The Path.

1.  Look closely at your end goal as it pertains to involving yourself within the Samson Society.  Ask yourself, at what pace and what exact goals have you set for yourself, again, as it pertains to ________.

2.  Look closely at the Samson Society group you're now affiliated with (assuming you're involved in 1 of the 5 Metro Jackson groups).  Specifically, analyze the specific men involved within your default group.  Are they within the same age group, demographic?  What about articulation / intelligence?  Analyze.  And from there, determine your comfortableness overall with the group itself.  From there, take stock in your good work by considering a change in setting if you believe this is the best course of action relative to your actually following The Path.

3.  Try to own up to how your abstaining from following The Path is restricting the work of the Holy Spirit in and through you yourself.  Often men see The Path as a one-way street, but it never is.  God can and will use you just as readily as he uses your Silas.  It is no doubt a selfish pursuit to abstain from The Path.

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In closing, I'm the Samson Society zealot I am today due to me finally embracing The Path by asking another man to firstly be my Silas.  

And what an amazing journey it has been.

   

Recommended Viewing

Recommended Listening

 

Jackson, MS: Home Of The Bastard Child / City of Crud

 Why are there five Samson Society groups in Metro Jackson?  

Mississippi is always tops (if not close to tops) in illegitimate births throughout the nation.  I can speak for myself (as a Mississippian) in saying that I was Bob & Darlene's quintessential bastard child.  Though bastard children are procreated throughout the 82 counties that make up Mississippi (at a ridiculously high rate), undoubtedly the highest concentration happen right here since the Metro Jackson area is the most densely populated.

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Jackson is a city teeming with shame.  You can see it especially well as an outsider looking in.  But, if you live amongst it, day after day, you obviously become more reticent to it.  It emanates from everything within the city, in particular, though once you're within the suburbs, it does tend to recede.

Shame is like a fragrance.  A fragrance that's very similar to sewage.  And, of course, its root is sexual sin.  Fornication, adultery, homosexuality, pedophilia, incest and so forth.

Sexual sin is powerfully debilitating to one's sense of hopefulness.  And without hope, citizens are disabled emotionally as neighbors, parents, children, and so forth.  Therefore, jadedness then sets in, and generations of Jacksonians are seemingly cursed.  The Jackson, MS of today marinates within that curse.

And this is why so many individuals avoid this place or work diligently to escape from it.  There's simply too much shame for them to stand.

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At least once a month, I reach out to my oldest friend who's now a resident of Huntsville, Alabama.  We catch up for +/-20 minutes thanks to the magic of smartphones.  

The architecture firm he works for is owned by fellow architecture classmates of ours (Mississippi State University class of 1995).  Classmates who like ourselves, spent our last year (5th year) of architecture school living / being schooled in Jackson.  

Jason was telling me today how much these longtime Huntsvillians loathed living in Jackson back in '94 / '95.  And as such, continue to chide the city's "cruddiness" from afar.  

In my opinion, they are spot on with that word.

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A Samson man who lived here in the Jackson Metro for a recent stint (who was also a native Alabamian) used to wonder out loud (to me) as to why there were no Samson Society groups in his native city of Birmingham.  

Birmingham and Huntsville are very different cities than Jackson.  Very different.

Years ago, I wrote a letter to the Executive Director of a men's ministry called "Young Business Leaders" that's headquartered in Birmingham, asking for an audience to discuss YBL potentially endorsing Samson Society as an alternative men's ministry.  

I never heard back from the man despite my very demonstrative letter (I was involved in YBL here in Jackson whilst a young man).

And I believe the reason for that had much to do with the geographical epicenter of YBL - Birmingham, AL.  Again, a very different city than Jackson.

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Jesus traveled constantly throughout his 3-year ministry on Earth.  Going from place to place, he preached, performed miracles, and socialized with his Hebrew brethren.  And the Bible speaks (within the gospel accounts) to places he resided where both his own words and those of his disciples fell flat.  As such, Jesus instructed his men as to how best to react to this, and by doing so, advising them that this reaction would inevitably come - in some locations.

Jackson, MS is a city where the need for Samson Society resonates with the majority of men.  The city literally is crying out for relief from the horrors that come with shame and jadedness.  Therefore, as a native Mississippi bastard child, who continues to manage my own shame daily, I'm absolutely privileged to be afforded the opportunity to serve Metro Jacksonians as a facilitator of one of five local Samson Society groups.

As they say, location, location, location.

Lagniappe

More lagniappe

What Did Jesus Do For "Shits & Giggles"?

Based on my experience, the most intelligent people can, and often are, the funniest, most fun-loving people to hang around.  If you enjoy stand-up comedy, you'll most likely agree with me on this.  For successful stand-up comedy takes immense intelligence to execute well.

And no matter your stance on the historical Jesus (as documented in the Bible), whether you're convinced he was a heretic, a madman or God in the flesh, he was no doubt, hands down one intelligent leader.

One of the most chronicled attributes of this man was his penchant for storytelling (parables).  These seemed to flow out of him with ease.  Storytellers are intrinsically fun to relate to / get to know.

All of this leads us to the question I posed within this blog post title.

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Firstly, what exactly is "shits & giggles" and should Christian men be so inclined to participate as such?

I really enjoy learning about The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  As such, I screened this documentary earlier this week:

Now, if you know anything about Mormons, you know that they're likely the most selfless, humble people on Earth.  These attributes are mainstays for them.  So much so, in fact, that they're also - across the board - a fairly derivative lot.  I mean, just look at the Mormon uniform that their young male missionaries wear - across the world.  Derivative.

If you watch the aforementioned documentary to its completion, you'll see a portion of it focusing on a group of young Mormon (missionary) men posing as calendar pinups.  As such, a minor scandal ensues, and the grounds for said scandal points back to the expected / identifier selfless / humbleness attributes I referenced above.

But, no doubt, they took part in this stunt for two reasons.  One was $$$ and the other was shits & giggles.  Because everyone knows that Mormons typically have an eye for the former (most of them are quite blessed with material wealth) and very little (if any) of the latter.

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Jesus talked specifically about avoiding "making your brother stumble".  As such, he obligated us to our fellow man's spiritual walk.  Therefore, if we're negatively influential in regards to our brother's decision to sin, we're responsible for our decision to impact them thusly.

And this expected empathy / "sphere of influence" influence speaks also to the need / mandate for sharp intelligence as a Christ follower.  

Therefore, the answer to the question I've posed (within the blog post) is as follows.

We're not privy to his exact activity, but we do know that whatever Jesus did do in this regard, it wasn't done sans putting some thought into how it might impact those around him (for better or worse).  For Jesus was fully man and fully God - all at once.  And, of course, sinless.  

Recommended Reading (Desiring God)

 Why Do You Want to Go to Heaven? | Desiring God

You're Not The Neediest

There are times when I simply spend way too much time up inside my head.  And for better or worse, the past few weeks have qualified as such.

What sometimes occurs when I linger inside my thoughts can only be described as me becoming divested or decoupled from everyone around me.  No matter how together - physically - I am with family / friends, etc.  And this had occurred as it had many times before.

Over the weekend, I broke free of this, and in doing so, was inspired by the reality that is this blog post title.

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God knows where his children are at (me included).  All the time.  As such, he jolted me back into reality over the weekend.  And not surprisingly, I was afforded the opportunity to spend some extended time with my Silas as these developments were occurring.  

As a follow up to that precious time, it was early Sunday night when the "self-centeredness spell" was finally broken.

For there's the reality of the occurrence and the recognition of the occurrence.  

Consider this post as a reporting of that recognition.  

Recommended Reading: Don't Forget Whose You Are (Licensed To Show Grace / Compassion)

 The importance of being shameless (washingtonexaminer.com)

Sex, Distorted / Elevated To Polarize

During the summer of '94, I backpacked through western Europe with 5 or 6 other individuals, most of which were Mississippi State architecture students (as I was).  Being there for 7 weeks, I was fortunate to visit 11 countries with the focus being notable buildings - urban and rural, gardens, etc.  I was in my early 20s at the time, and my colleagues were of similar ages.  All of us behaved scholarly during the entire trip unlike some of the other college students who were there at the time (per my observations).  And I'm not saying that to boast.  To be honest, we were just a bunch of geeks who were best suited to keeping our attention on the "tasks at hand".

About halfway through this once-in-a-lifetime trek, we found ourselves staying within a hostel in Austria.  I remember the country being Austria because Salzburg is where The Sound of Music was filmed, and I became aware of this whilst staying there (I've never screened the film).  It was quite the picturesque country(side).

One of my colleagues bunked with me within a very clean but cramped room with four other young men (also American college students backpacking throughout the summer, though not a part of our group) .  The tiny room was just big enough for three bunkbeds and one lavatory (a wall mounted sink).  The floor plan of the room was such that it was "two bunkbeds deep" and "three bunkbeds wide" with the middlemost bunk missing if you catch my measurement drift.

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What keeps individuals out of sales is the ever present & quite trepidatious mantra - ACTIVITY, ACTIVITY, ACTIVITY.  Sales managers can at times berate their minions accordingly, and for good reason.  That being because there's some truth to it.  Some.  

Mostly though, you either have the knack for sales (and this must be coupled with excellent timing) or you don't.  No matter how much ACTIVITY (sales calls) you participate in.

The summer after my freshman year in college, I worked as a new car salesman at Howard Wilson Chrysler Plymouth in Jackson.  That two months was one of the most eye-opening experiences of my life, and as such, I was only afforded the opportunity because my parents & I had purchased my '91 Plymouth Laser RS from this dealership a few months prior.  

What I took away from that summer, working as a car salesman, was the importance a salesman must have of product knowledge - across the board. 

Fortunately for me, ever since I was around age 14, I've been a car aficionado, therefore as a new car salesman at age 18, I not only knew the product I was attempting to sell but the competition's product as well.  Or at least as well as a teenager could.  Comprehensively.  

Again, mate that knowledge with great timing, and sales do happen.  Almost magically.  And that's what can make sales fun and very satisfying to experience because you're not just screwing people over with smoke & mirrors.

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Solo sex (masturbation) is (by default) a hollow, relentlessly self-centered pursuit fueled 99% of the time by sexual fantasy coupled with an active libido.  It's an ACTIVITY, ACTIVITY, ACTIVITY that's built primarily on one's "expertise" of the human body driving lust via imaginings.  Of course, these fantasies can be carried along much more proficiently thanks to pornographic imagery.  Imagery which in no way typically represents any sort of sexual reality (certainly not of a Biblical nature).   

Many year ago, I was watching a Geraldo Rivera talk show episode out of sheer boredom.  I believe he was interviewing class (school) mates of celebrities, and a handful of these individuals on this particular show had been childhood friends of Madonna.  As such, Geraldo queried these guests relentlessly, aching for some dirt on Ms. Ciccone.  

No doubt, one of these former friends had tipped off Madonna relative to their appearance on his TV show because seemingly unexpectedly (of course, it could have always been staged), Madonna herself called in to speak to Mr. Rivera.

As you might imagine, she seemd none too pleased with the premise of the show, and in reaction to this, she asked Geraldo the following:  "Have you ever had sex with yourself?".

I remember hearing this and feeling polarized if not a bit nauseous.  From that point on, I gained an entirely new perspective on Madonna.

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The only time I've ever witnessed live sexual activity was within the aforementioned hostel bunk room there in Salzburg, Austria.  And obviously, it wasn't by choice.  Yet, as you might imagine, there in the darkness whilst peering across the room (bleary-eyed), I felt polarized as I observed these two lovers perform coitus / cunninlingus like a couple of jack rabbits. 

Sexual activity is defined clearly in Scripture as a metaphor.  A metaphor which includes Jesus Christ (husband) and his church (wife).  So, if we explore that for a moment, we clearly see that intercourse is meant to physically consummate a relationship in marriage.  

So, what is marriage and why is sexual activity - today - so polarizing?

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On numerous occasions, I've heard individuals talk through the importance of "test driving" a boy / girlfriend under the guise of sexual proficiency prior to marriage.  

As if human beings were like animals and intercourse was simply what you do whilst feeling an erection coming on, or better yet, qualify another human being's worth.

ACTIVITY, ACTIVITY, ACTIVITY.  Sound familiar?

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Sex sells merchandise, contracts, real estate, automobiles, entertainment and on and on and on here in our western culture.  A titillating advertising campaign / experience is arguably the most effective (low hanging fruit) means to pitch almost anything due to how it builds on foundational distortions.  Hands down.  As such, we are brainwashed into elevating sex and sexuality to the upper echelon of relevancy / importance within our menial lives (from childhood onward).  

Yet, the Bible states that it's best to remain single if you're to most effectively be positioned to execute God's work, putting marriage one notch (if several notches) below bachelorhood.  

So that begs the question that I believe needs to be asked once more.  What exactly is marriage?

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Marriage is like clothing.  Not really necessary but so effective at fleshing out a holistic understanding of ourselves as God's created beings.  As such, marriage speaks to our then fully realized identity.  

But remaining naked is admirable (according to Scripture).  For clothing can certainly embolden us in ways that serve to take our focus from Christ and our relationship with him due to the time / energy required relative to upkeep (of each other / offspring).

And then there's the reality of sex within marriage which runs counter to everything our culture indoctrinates us with 24/7/365.  

Sex isn't supposed to be polarizing.  It wasn't created to be.  It also wasn't created to be elevated as it has as the primary achievable / enviable attribute of every human being.

Car designs might be polarizing or architectural styles but not sex, sexuality.  

Madonna Ciccone's entire career is a representation of the distortion that our sexualized culture has embraced.  All the material wealth she's obtained is built on a distortion of one of the most overrated / blown out of proportion attributes of marriage.

We need knowledge to gain back the ground that's been lost in this regard.  The time is now.  Snap out of this ruse; wake up to reality.

Recommended Reading From The Gospel Coalition

 If God Rescued Me, He Can Rescue Anyone (thegospelcoalition.org)

Think Tank

Intelligence is one of those topics that is almost impossible to handle sans offending someone.  Therefore, I'm sorry in advance.

Samson Society demands men to be authentic.  I would argue, regarding most individuals, that it takes more intellect to be transparent than otherwise.  Most importantly, you've got to manage / harness your feelings in order to speak intelligently regarding your authentic self.  All manner of feelings.  From one end of the spectrum to the other.  It seems to me that it's higher brain (executive) function that must be utilized in this regard, unless of course, it's not available to do the work.  Otherwise, you're left to rely on what I'll dub here as the "personality veil", and this reeks of anything but authenticity.

Of secondary importance is one's ability via their intellect to articulate who exactly they are to everyone in attendance.  I say it's of secondary importance because over time, with enough meetings under a guy's belt, that true persona is going to be clearly seen.  It's inevitable.  Of course, unless you're dealing with a pathological liar, but let's just assume that isn't the case. 

Now, here's an overarching truth.  Faith is a gift of God.  And Christiandom is built on the notion of having faith as of a little child.  Therefore, worship and prayer and even Bible teaching / study can occur seamlessly, so long as there is faith.

But, Samson Society (both meetings and "The Path" friendships) demands more of us than faith.  

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Hiding behind a "personality veil" is akin to "going through the motions".  I think everyone can relate to that phrase, but I feel as if I need to expound on it here.

When I worked the enjoyable six years for the state of Mississippi, I kept my head down constantly.  Rarely did I relinquish this "personality veil" modus operandi, and frankly, I believe this was detrimental to my livelihood during my tenure there.  Because the job literally fell into my lap, I felt extremely blessed to have the opportunity.  Therefore, not wanting to risk complicating matters in any regard, I simply smiled at the camera, day after day.  And it was easy to fall in line in this regard.  For many of my fellow bureaucrats behaved exactly the same way.

Eventually, this grew old for I couldn't help but remember what employment was like within the private sector (where there was actually some overarching corporate goal).  Particularly as the Lord allowed men into my life who were reliant on me being my authentic self whilst spending time together (friendships that came to fruition outside of work).  

When I took the job at Delta State in 2012 (a position which was a natural vocational progression for me), I was on the fence relative to how much of my presented self should then be cloaked in this "personality veil", and over time, during that yearlong endeavor, I definitely began to rely on it less and less.  But of course, all of this rich maturation came to a screeching halt when I unexpectedly was fired from this position.

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One of the reasons Angie and I worship at Lakeside Presbyterian Church is due to the fact that it's a reformed church.  And reformed churches tend to draw Christians in who're less interested in notoriety relative to church attendance and more interested in sanctification (spiritual growth).  

Lakeside is a difficult church to only put one foot into because no one component of the experience is going to suffice.  Plus, it's small scale provides few, if any, places to "keep to the shadows".  

Therefore, most parishioners of this body of Christ are all in.  And as such, they're well served by their intellect as they participate.  

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In closing, if you're drawn to communal experience with other Christian men who've the brains to match their courage (in participating), invest in Samson Society.  

What you'll find is it's impossible to look down on those who choose not to take part due to the purpose imbued within the Society itself.  

Therefore, I consider it to be a win-win.  Not at all a waste of time / resources.