Demystifying The Archetype

I was introduced to my archetype whilst in 6th grade.  The year was 1985, and I was at a weeklong summer camp for 5th and 6th grade boys in south Alabama.  This summer camp experience was hosted by our church, and surprisingly (to me today), I can only recall 5th and 6th grade boys from First Baptist Church Jackson attending.  Therefore, there were no more than 30 to 40 of us there (if that many) during this week, and this made it a truly intimate experience.

The retreat center was small and rural.  I remember a somewhat small, placid lake accessible by a gravel road, a couple of small bunkhouses and a combined cafeteria / meeting or assembly building making up the campus.  The music of this particular summer was Van Halen's 1984 album, therefore it well represented that particular masculine vibe that was hitting us culturally from most every side.  I can recall vividly during the Friday night "talent show" having the privilege of "running the lights" (turning the fluorescent troffers on and off spasmodically) relative to supporting one of the "boy band" lip sync acts.  No doubt, their song of choice was "Jump".

Our bunkhouse of boys had +/-12 young men within with one college-age chaperone.  His name was Greg, and it was he who made such a distinct impression on young Rob during that week (& beyond).

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What is an archetype?  

To me, it's a figure of mystery that's sexualized relative to timing, in part due to the inevitable awakening of one's sexuality during puberty (childhood).  

Greg was mysterious to all of us boys.  He was very quiet and built like a much older man than his college age suggested.  Therefore, we were all quite intimidated by him.  Yet we were as well, glad to know he was amongst us.  It wasn't that his presence threatened us overall, but you could sense - particularly due to his quiet demeanor - that he wasn't all that pleased about spending his week that summer with us.  

But this mystery was catalyzed when I had a personal encounter with him on the eve of the day we arrived.  This occurred as he stepped naked out of a shower stall.  Both he and I were alone together in the men's room with me standing at one of the lavoratories when his naked and wet reflection in the mirror caught me off guard.  I remember laughing out of shock, and him reacting to my laughter with a "What?".  

Me sharing this very innocent yet intimate moment with him served to elevate this young (but very mature-looking) man within my mind.  Eventually to reside high above the stratosphere throughout much of the remainder of my childhood.

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I longed to be pursued by my archetype.  That was my ultimate desire as a boy.  Not having a father, older brother, uncle, etc. that I felt close to / mentored by, I chose Greg instead.  From there, lust and sexual fantasies ensued.  And this was a bittersweet solution, as you might imagine.  For it certainly didn't reconcile well with my Christian faith, yet it was at times exhilaratingly satisfying to have - within my mind's eye - an older male within my life serving me at my beck and call. 

So how do you demystify these figureheads within your mind?

You don't.  You can't.  They've grown too big, become to strong and are so far removed from reality.  I know that because I attended a funeral a few years back at my home church, First Baptist Church Jackson, and Greg was there with his mother.  They were seated on the same pew as I was.  I realized then how useless an attempt it would be to defang my mind's understanding of the archetype that was birthed out of him.  

But what you can do is face it by providing a narrative to the archetype itself that's best described as back / forward story.  And this needs to be a narrative that's grounded much more so in reality than (sexual) fantasy.  Sure, the archetype can still be over the top aesthetically within this back / forward narrative, but what you're striving for is grounding the character somewhat within your adult mind.  From there, I've found at least, that its influence begins to diminish.  From the standpoint of the archetype being such the exclamation point versus a series of paragraphs (if not more) within your grey matter.

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Why is this important to consider?

The narrative (back / forward story) you contrive for your archetype will reflect your ideals as they exist today versus what they were during your childhood.  And this will reflect clearly upon who you've become as an adult, having grown out of childhood.  

This gives the archetype legs so to speak, and in turn, somewhat equal footing to stand on as you yourself.  In lieu of simply existing as a puppet.

Also, my hope is that you're no longer isolated as you were as a boy, having involved yourself in some form of authentic Christian community like Samson Society.  This should, in turn, diminish the authority of your archetype as you dialogue about it with other men.  And maybe too, what comes out of those conversations will provide you with inspiration therein.  Inspiration that's relative to how best you might approach expanding your ideal into more of a reflection of yourself and less of a teddy bear.