Wife Material

Based on my observations / experience, here're some mainstays relative to choosing a wife you'll want to stay married to "'till death do us part".  

1.  She wasn't reared within a substantially (ultra) materially wealthy home (with all the typical trappings).

2.  She doesn't smoke cigarettes.

3.  She knows how to cook food (& enjoys the process of preparing meals / expanding her knowledge therein).

4.  She isn't constantly picking up stray animals / rescuing them by bringing them home as permanent residents.

5.  She clearly understands that married women DO NOT have intimate (close) male friends (no matter their sexual preference).

6.  She's abhorrent towards the idea of gratuitously posting selfies on social media, and likewise, strategically categorizes social media as a juvenile time-waster.

7.  She's willing to yield to her husband.

8.  She's not mentally ill (or showing signs of severe mental illness).

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& now for my commentary regarding each of these:

1.  Women who're reared in ultra-material wealth typically look to marry into a similarly portfolio-ed tribe.  If your fam is within that category, then this #1 doesn't apply to you.  Go right ahead and marry that silver spoon.  But if you're a plebeian from a plebeian tribe, my advice is to steer clear of these ladies.

And only because their demographic expectations may very well put a substantial amount of pressure on you as her husband.  Plus, based on what I've observed, ultra-wealthy in-laws often leverage much of their influence via their ability to shower material gifts that are far from appropriate.  And this can especially be problematic when grandchildren come on the scene.

Ultimately, if you find yourself seriously romantically involved within one of these monetarily asymmetrical setups, take some substantial time to query your love about her "standard of living" ideals going forward - 5, 15, 25 years into the future.

2.  My wife worked as the CFO of a software company years ago, and one of the three owners was a woman who smoked cigarettes.  She was in her early 60s at the time, and no doubt had a college degree, having had the vocational success she'd achieved.  But, she hid the cigarette smoking as best she could because she knew, just as everyone else did, that it reflected a serious personality flaw of hers.  

Professional men typically smoke (though not always) as a means to demarcate their community.  Professional women smoke because it's a crutch.  

You shouldn't be involved with a woman who's on crutches.

3.  In line with this simple-to-understand statement is the following truth:  EVERY HUSBAND SHOULD BE ABLE TO PREPARE THE SAME MEAL HIS WIFE DOES (just not as expertly).  The best way to avoid family budget crisis is to meal plan / prepare 99% of meals at home.  And this includes meals (lunch) that are consumed during work hours.  Restaurants of every ilk have exploded in popularity over the past 25 years.  Compared to my growing-up years during the '80s, the concentrated quantity of restaurants is absolutely staggering.  Mated to that are all the gimmicks they offer up to us consumers.  From smartphone apps to drive-through options, it's absolutely mind blowing.

If your wife loathes cooking, and there's a houseful of mouths to feed, that's a problem.  Now, if you're (hubby) up to doing all the meal planning and cooking, so be it.  But here's the caveat:  Somebody's got to shop for the food that's prepared at home.  In essence, they've got to take the meal plan, generate a grocery list and purchase those items.  From there, those items must be transported home, unloaded and put away.  

In our household, for the most part, that's (grocery shopper) always been my job.  

4.  That's a no brainer.  No commentary needed.

5.  This too is a no brainer.  If a woman will not embrace this level of respect for her man (future husband), she' not wife material.

6.  Isn't it sad that I have to include this within the list?  Are you wanting to marry a girl or a woman?  If it's the latter, there's a definitive mindset towards time-wasting vices like these that will be apparent to you.

7.  Wives who're willing to yield recognize that marriages cannot be two-headed.  Marriage is not a democracy or a 50/50 partnership.  If it were, it would eventually tear itself apart.  

Now, wives can certainly interject their opinion, waxing poetic regarding the situation at hand, but ultimately, it comes down to the husband bringing finality to the matter (with grace & dignity).  

If you examine popular culture's take on marriage (television), you'll never see this complementary hierarchy in action.  Typically, the husband is an idiot, and therefore the wife is left to lead cunningly.  Sometimes too, you'll see whatever scripted, insignificant ordeal resolve "on its own creative accord" in spite of the conflicted opinions between the spouses.  All this downplays the yielding that someone's got to buy into within marriage.  A yielding that (if originating from the wife) embodies the utmost respect for her husband and his competency as the head of the household.  

8.  This too is self-explanatory.  Marriage is hard enough as it is, much less with a woman who's struggling with serious (very difficult to treat) mental illness issues (bipolar, clinical depression, borderline personality disorder, schizophrenia).