How could one grow up in a church, attend Christian colleges, hundreds of events, read tons of Christian literature and spend a great deal of my time in ministry situations and yet still discover deep wounds and hidden sin? Was this sin hidden due to my own personal sense of denial or was there some complicity on the part of the community in which I was attempting to live out my faith? Was I being offered a discipleship model that was unrealistic and in truth dishonest and unwittingly inauthentic? I am convinced that both my own denial and the communities’ corporate sense of denial created an environment where rhetoric and theology, knowledge, and posturing, often disempowered real authentic discipleship. Many in 12 step programs will attest to the depths of despair their lives had to reach before they began to really take an honest inventory of their true spiritual state. In fact, many will contend that until their personal and precipitous fall from grace, they were oblivious as to their true beliefs and spiritual life.
How can men be in proximity to such spiritual sustenance and still find themselves unable to see what life is really offering? How can one claim knowledge about God and His Word and still remain oblivious to a wound or even more tragic, a major character flaw that is setting them up for a public fall that will devastate more than them personally but all those within their family and possible sphere of influence?
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