Think of the Beth Dutton, JR Ewing, Brenda Walshes specifically, and you'll understand where I'm coming from.
They're a lot more interesting to watch than Fred Rogers, aren't they?
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Television characters must exist on a disproportioned spectrum of reality. This is an outgrowth of theater where everything must be larger-than-life to truly be entertaining / keep the audience's attention.
But what gives when you find yourself living alongside one (or more) of these? Where do you go from there?
You know the answer to that one. Get the hell out of dodge.
Let's discuss the harder part of this equation. Preparing yourself to face these folks. Identification is key.
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My closest female friend in high school, Shannon, was one year my senior. She was very mature for her age and quite the contrarian when it came to both her style and interests. Shannon came from an upper-class family whereas I was very much middle-class. Her (Golden State) mother had remarried her attorney (Magnolia State) father after losing her first husband (Navy sailor) in a tragic submarine vanish. Both Shannon and her younger brother came from that second betrothal. This now blended family (her mother had birthed two daughters from her first husband) was one I always found intriguing to hang with as a teen for they were SO VERY unlike any other family I was close to.
And that unlikeness was spearheaded by Shannon's mom. A typical Mississippi suburban mom of the 1980s she was most definitely not. It was always a bit intimidating engaging with Jolene, even in passing (& I was by no means a shy teen). She was so intelligent, opinionated and articulate. The complete opposite of the familiar folksy, sweet and cornpone.
But I digress...
Shannon had an admirer who was two (or maybe three) years her junior at our small private academy. This younger girl was also in the marching band with Shannon (& I) even though she was only in middle school at the time.
It became immediately apparent to everyone that this young admirer was not at all well as it pertained to her admiration (obsession) of Shannon. For her behavior towards herself, Shannon and everyone else became unusually out of character for a middle-school girl.
How Shannon coolly handled this younger girl was absolutely empowering to witness. It was as if my friend literally had been born to navigate the relational dangers / complexities she'd found herself now saddled with.
I still look back on that with intrigue (as well as heartache). In the end, the younger girl was removed from school and institutionalized. Post release, she thankfully didn't return ot our small school. Nevertheless, I admired Shannon that much more for what she'd endured and modeled with such civility / compassion towards this junior (high) admirer.
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Shannon immediately identified her relationship with this younger girl as problematic. Especially so considering her somewhat "forced proximity" to her (fellow schoolmate / marching band member). From there, she did everything she could to shield herself from the girl. Much of her strategy consisted of fencing herself in via healthy, supportive friends.
But firstly, the miracle herein was her deep-seated sense of self protection versus what you might typically see from a female teen (manipulation, harassment, pandering, entitlement) who was the subject of said emotional (& eventually physical) stalking.
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Your well-being matters firstly. Even when you're tempted to compromise that in return for some prospective future reward / promotion / solidification / gratification. It's important to remember that. No matter the "rank" / position of family / friends / employers / leaders within your sphere of influence (or theirs), the most important consideration is your health firstly. For you cannot walk back stupid. For stupid is a past tense verb.
In closing, if it's not feasible to physically fence yourself in with healthier relations in light of the unhealthy influence, take the time to do so with God's spirit BEFORE engaging with the "handful". You most certainly can figuratively get the hell out of dodge via the Lord blanketing you throughout. Bank on that, don't lose hope.
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