The older I get, the more I appreciate / feel at peace with my God-given 49-year-old physical body, and thereby am less focused on others' (bodies). It's embarrassing to reminiscence on just how consumed I was - as my younger self - with certain others' bodies (hot, athletically-built guys), but as a highly visual guy, I'm of the opinion that I was not the exception (my sexuality notwithstanding).
Looking at others and seeing physical beauty in a person's body / face, whether it's the entire package or a portion therein, always felt very, very wrong - morally - to be doing. But I was a naive "kid in a candy store" as a found myself growing from boy to man. With zero direct fatherly guidance, much less a sounding board to respectfully query during my adolescence, my self-image took a double beating. The repetitiveness of which only served to promulgate further my obsession with seemingly everyone else's culturally normalized masculinity - to my own's detriment.
Exacerbating all of this internal loathing was '80s / early '90s entertainment (television / film / periodicals). And, of course, I was not alone. Most everyone within that time period was tracking similarly as the American public was captivated culturally by the wild, wild West Coast's photographed propaganda.
Taking all of this into account, every bit of this - as described here - was / is directly involving my humanity. No doubt, this represents a sizable part of Rob.
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At some point during my mid-30s, I happened upon (thanks to the www) one very unexpected Christian celebrity pastor. On the surface, it was this man's amazing communications skills combined with his decidedly masculine looks / swagger that truly piqued my interest. Never had I seen nor heard a pastor quite like this Mark Driscoll (who just happened to also be my age).
But now, whilst looking back, what I truly believe I was drawn to was
1) his brooding outrage / disgust with so much that he'd been subject to within his own Americanized '80s (Pacific Northwest) upbringing (of which I could directly relate to).
2) the man's potential, which far exceeded his ability to preach.
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Before proceeding, an important special bulletin (for those of you whose own experience with Mars Hills Church - Pastor Mark's former - continues to muddy the emotional waters). This is such a wonderful response to that situation from October of 2014.
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Why are these two items important, and how do they pertain to the questions posed within this blog post? Much less, my relationship with my own humanness.
Humanity's primary definer is limitations. We are finite, fleshly beings who live / breathe for a season / during a season here on Earth. As such, we grow and become during that season. Hence, so much of our (internally) known / recognized identity comes from that growing / becoming.
Jesus, according to Scripture, grew as well and eventually became the man who was baptized by his cousin before ministering nonstop ('till his death / resurrection) to the masses.
Pastor Mark Driscoll preached / preaches incessantly about Jesus, and it was apparent that through that preaching, he resonated deeply with the Jesus presented within the gospels combined with the portion of Jesus he saw (& could relate to) within himself (his own God-imaged humanity).
As such, the outcome of all of this was extremely compelling to his parishioners. And I believe that compelling was indirectly (subconsciously) fueled by the two items I cited earlier within this post. Let's review them again.
1) his brooding outrage / disgust with so much that he'd been subject to within his Americanized '80s (Pacific Northwest) upbringing.
2) the man's potential which far exceeded his ability to preach.
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I believe - as Mark Driscoll preached - that Jesus was both deeply sympathetic to humanity's plight (physical illnesses / disabilities, disastrous consequences / outcomes and the ensuing heartache) combined with his overwhelming disdain for the Hebrew culture (keyword) that took advantage of people - in order to establish a religiously entitled class structure.
Yet, Jesus neither had (was forced) to care about any of this, nor was he relegated to serve and ultimately die.
His humanity demonstrated that, yet he very much desired for this to be part of his narrative.
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One of the dumbest aspects of comic book superheroes is how utterly unbelievable / unrealistic they behave morally. If there were mutants or meta-humans or aliens who looked like humans on Earth, of which could read minds or fly or were super strong, etc., each and every one of them would take full advantage of their superiority relative to everyone else. As such, they would rule all of us with an iron fist (fear), exploiting our inferiority to them.
And this is an especially true reality -taking into account - how corrupt we are as a human-beings. For they would easily find credence to repeatedly punish us via their adjudicatory whimsy.
There are a whole lotta Christians out there who've dedicated their lives to the pastorate, the mission field - in spite of - their gifting of leadership, work ethic, creativity, etc. As such, their "plight" makes no sense if you consider their potential.
This is one of the most brutally consequential realities of the Christian faith. And it cannot be brushed aside because it precisely aligns with Jesus himself - as he was presented in the gospels.
In the end, it's a praiseworthy, mind-blowing element of faith. Faith that runs counter to / best manages our God-imaged yet very fallen humanity.
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So what is Jesus' humanity demanding of him today? Does he still require sleep, food, somewhere to relieve himself? Do his sex organs still function (erections)? Is he sneezing on occasion? Is his hair (head / beard) regularly groomed, per his liking?
If the answer to these questions wasn't of course, then you'd not have men like Mark Driscoll. Mark Driscoll, who though not perfect (by a long shot), certainly has / does continue to humanly impact the world for Christ in conjunction with the perspective he's gained via Christ's humanity.
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