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Thursday, August 24, 2023
"The No Bull Briefing" - August 2023
Sunday, August 20, 2023
Thursday, August 17, 2023
"Dare To Live!" - JR Everhart
I was experiencing some quiet time with the Lord this morning, and he challenged me with this: ”I dare you to live above your fear, to run free and confident inside my mercy and grace. I dare you to believe that you are worthy to be known and loved just the way you are. To step off the pathway of guilt and shame and onto the narrow trail of joy and laughter. I dare you to walk outside your world of isolation, and be courageous enough to meet new people, believing that healthy connection is possible with others. I dare you to live your life fully in spite of the two-faced wolves in sheep’s clothing. I dare you to trust in my plan for your life, trusting me to shield you and protect you from the fiery darts of the enemy. I dare you to love others in spite of their brokenness, never letting their bitterness sway you in anyway. As such, staying true to the path I’ve laid before you, only believing this one simple truth: 'I've got you!' I dare you to use the gifts and talents I’ve placed in you to blaze a trail of light into the dark forest of this world, knowing that I have important work for you. I dare you to believe in my strength even when you feel weak, confident that I am with you always. Trusting that nothing can rob you from my hands; you are mine and as your father, I will never leave or forsake you. You are never alone or separate from me. Even in your deepest times of doubt and struggle, I see the intentions of your heart. Dare to believe I love you as much in those perilous moments than in the glorious moments of my anointing flowing through you in ministry. YOU ARE WORTHY! My son gave his life for this very moment in your story. Soar, alive in me and free from the evil of this world. Yes, hard times will come, and suffering is part of the human experience, but dare to believe that I have prepared a place for you in heaven where there is no sickness or disappointment. Where you will live in the warm glow of my love for you forever!”
Needless to say, I’m speechless and will spend weeks unpacking all this. Trust is hard for me, but I’m going to choose to believe this with everything in me. I think it’s natural to feel unworthy of such kind words, but we serve a kind and gentle Father in heaven. To God be all the glory!!! Amen…🙌🏻
Wednesday, August 16, 2023
"I Found Jesus In Prison..." Ethan #8
"For it is true, we can seldom help those closest to us. Either we don't know what part of ourselves to give or, more often than not, the part we have to give is not wanted. And so, it's those we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them - we can love them completely without completely understanding."
Norman Maclean ~ A River Runs Through It
Tuesday, August 15, 2023
Go Ahead & Leverage Your Love By Being A "Hard Ass" (Both Inside & Outside Of Samson Society)
I distinctly remember (first time) when I was officially chosen / selected to be another Samson guy's Silas. Despite there being no official ask, the routine telephone calls starting coming in. Eventually, I inquired (late 2014) as to why this younger man had chosen me, and his reply essentially was, "you were the only one who seemed to care (take an interest) about me and my story". (Actually, I was simply being polite.) As such, he mistook that, but I felt in no way less privileged to have been (unassumingly) chosen to walk with this man.
Because I had no Silas of my own, it didn't take long for me to feel expectedly burdened (asymmetrical) by both him and other Samson men who similarly tethered themselves to Rob.
Whilst looking back, I realize now that the primary draw to choosing me in this regard had to do with my superpower.
Remembering - over time - what these men were telling me. To the point that I could regurgitate it down the road. This sat well with these new friends for it proved my interest in them and their stories.
I refer to this superpower as crystallization. I'm pretty sure it's linked to my sexuality.
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It didn't take me long to recognize that I could glean some of my own needs from these "Silees" via the questions I chose to ask of them during our regular "check-ins", but for the most part, it was they who were receiving (support) from me.
Over time, I became fatigued. (Again, you'll recall that I had no Silas of my own.)
Nonetheless, I found peace in knowing that I'd deposited an awful lot of time and listening effort into these men. Both from the standpoint of serendipity and Christ-likeness. Not to mention simply being "Silas-like" (listener).
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Once Rob gained a Silas, everything changed (hooray for symmetry!). Particularly relative to me having developed long-term friendships with these "Silees".
Let me explain.
After six months of formal "check-ins" from a "Silee", I found that I had gained a pretty thorough understanding of how my new friends were wired. Good, bad, and indifferent. Too, as I connected with more and more men, I began to see obvious patterns within the recovery narrative that no doubt cross pollinated. And this is where I began to use my influence towards seeing those tried-and-true patterns implemented where they were not (yet).
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My middle daughter officially moved into her freshman dorm this past weekend. Unlike her older sister (two years her senior, who's enrolled at the same institution), she didn't have an established friendship with her roommate (high school, church friend or the like).
My wife and I did the obligatory hauling of our middle daughter's dorm essentials, showing up for freshman "move-in day" at our set time. Upon entering her room, her (very new friend) roommate's side was completely, 100% setup. Every (coordinated) trinket in place, photo hung, etc. This came as a shock! For we'd no idea how they'd pulled this off in such short time.
Being as completely unexpected as it was, we couldn't help but contrast it to what we experienced with our oldest daughter's freshman roommate / roommate's family two years prior. In that instance, everything was "assembled & set up" collaboratively as the two roommates worked together from start to finish - over a period of 4 - 6 hours - in a sort of christening of THEIR dorm room.
Now, keep in mind that my middle daughter had dialogued (& even briefly rendezvoused with) her "new friend" freshman roommate throughout this past summer. They communicated regularly regarding room decor and so forth. Hence, there was an expectation there relative to a collaborative effort.
But this was not to be. And yes, it resulted in an awkwardness going forward. An awkwardness that felt divisive.
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I pressed two Samson brothers hard recently and have no regrets doing so regarding them getting out of their relational (related to other Samson brothers & family members) comfort zones. It's important to know that both men, I've walked with each for well over six months.
Why do this?
1. Because I'm convicted that they need to move in their specific new direction on behalf of their recovery.
2. I've deposited a tremendous amount of listening / analytical time into both men.
3. I've the expertise as a tenured Samson man to feel confident in my attempts to optimize the work they're doing.
I may never hear from either again as a result. Nonetheless, I have no regrets. Our friendships' growth is absolutely hinged on their individual growth as it relates to where we've walked - together - (as well as what we've learned) up to that point in time. In other words, if they're not growing, we're not growing. If this stagnation truly is the case, it's probably a good time for them to find a new Silas.
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My middle daughter sent me a series of photos last night of her now exquisitely setup side of her & her roommate's dorm room.
After having effectively moved all of my middle daughter's essentials into the space prior to assisting her with making up her bed, we left the remaining for her to assemble / unpack / organize on her own & at her own pace. As you can imagine, she was initially not at all pleased with this arrangement, as feelings of abandonment welled up into her teary eyes (in contrast to her roommate's miraculously complete setup).
But it was for her best as well as for our best that we take that approach. And it worked out beautifully in the end.
My wife and I have invested and invested and invested some more into our middle daughter (just as we have her older and younger sister). Even at that seemingly critical juncture (freshman dorm move-in day), it was important that we hold the line, giving her an opportunity to move forward at the pace of her choosing, knowing full well that this presented an opportunity for growth (all around).
Remembering all the while that the relational narratives we'd made - up to that point - will forever be crystallized, set to remain so forever as her relationship with us matures forward.
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