I had the privilege to delve into volunteer work in my early 30s (20+ years ago). This volunteer leadership position that I was appointed to was far more demanding / intimidating than I ever could have imagined it would be, and much of that challenge centered around the individuals I was tasked to serve alongside (we were all appointed simultaneously / I knew none of these older men).
About three years into my volunteered position tenure, tension between myself and another volunteer had reached a fever pitch. As such, that tension reached its inevitable conclusion whilst having to confront him regarding some questionable funds' (organizational) usage. And that's when I was read the riot act (thankfully I wasn't alone with this colleague when this lambasting occurred). And when I say I was read the riot act, I'm talking expertly / with zero restraint. I remember feeling afterwards as if I'd been fire hosed down with gasoline prior to my colleague lighting a match.
There's a current phrase for this: scorched earth. As such, any semblance of remaining relationship was completely burned up after this 10–15-minute deluge of spite.
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A few years back, I surprisingly encountered my former volunteer colleague. We eventually spoke politely (as subsequent encounters occurred), and I was hopeful for some sort of potential reconciliation. Choosing to not be jaded / bitter was the best position to take.
Unfortunately, today, I'm again having to face down this same man due to me, once again, stepping up to volunteer (identical organization). He's already made it very clear that the calendared rendezvous itself is a huge waste of his time / energy.
Thankfully, once again, I won't be alone during this juncture.
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What's clear to me as I head into this is the following: This man is allergic to Rob and likely always will be. And there's nothing I can do about that.
Therefore, I must minimize as much as possible during this meeting. How?
I'm so grateful to be serving today alongside some excellent co-volunteers who're supportive and not at all naive / easily swayed (they've each been around the block). Ultimately, my plan is less of Rob and more of them.
But my secret weapon is to remain hopeful about this situation. And it is a situation. I truly know nothing about the inner workings of this man and do not pretend to. That being said, I'm older / wiser. And though scars remain, my dignity is intact. And that's what's most important to me.
Some relationships barrel towards ending badly. Very, very badly. Nonetheless, as a Christian, in particular, be mindful of the approach you choose to take therein. You have a witness to first & foremost protect.
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